Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
There once was a poor lad named Timmy who had the misfortune of being born with only a head — no arms, no legs, nothing but a head. Now Timmy was a basically happy person and he was loved and cared for by his family. As long as he stayed within the shelter of his family he was unworried by his condition, but as soon as he was thrust out into the world he knew that something was seriously wrong.…
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The teacher in a fifth grade class said, “Class, I want you to imagine that you are the President of the United States and write an essay about what you will do for your country.” All of the students start writing, but the teacher sees little Johnny not writing at all. The teacher asks him, “Johnny, why aren’t you writing your essay?” Little Johnny replies, “I am waiting for my secretary.”
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Over the dinner table, Mrs. Moskowitz said to her spouse, “You know how nervous and tense I’ve been lately, Jake? Well, I went to see the doctor.” “Yes,” murmured Moskowitz, never lifting his eyes from the soup he was eating. “And what did the doctor say, Becky?” “He examined me thoroughly, Jake, and said that physically, I was in fine shape. He said all I needed was some sex.” Moskowitz’a attention was now caught. “Is that so?” he said. “And…
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**How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be open by the time she brings it! **Why is a laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can’t even afford a washing machine will never be able to support you! **Why do women have smaller feet than men? So they can stand closer to the kitchen sink! **How do you know when a woman’s about to say something smart?…
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A cleaning woman was applying for a new position. When asked why she left her last employment, she replied, “Yessir, they paid good wages, but it was the most ridiculous place I ever worked! They played a game called ‘Bridge,’ and last night a lot of folks were there. As I was about to bring in refreshments, I heard a man say, ‘Lay down and let’s see what you got.’ Another man said, ‘I got strength and no length.’ And…
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God’s Human DNA Code For many years molecular biologists have been mystified by the fact that very little of an organism’s DNA seems to serve any useful function. I have solved the mystery. The reason why only 30% of human DNA performs any useful function is that the rest of it is comments. Once we decode a typical human genome, we see that the contents begin as follows: ===/* HUMAN_DNA.H * * Human Genome * Version 2.1 * * (C)…
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A Woman is walking trough the train searching for a seat, finally she finds one and sits down. Across the woman is a man with a bag of seeds… and the man is eating the seeds one by one. Curious the woman asks: “Why are you eating seeds?” “These aren’t just seeds,” explains the man, this are seeds of the smart apple tree.. when you eat these seeds you instantly become smarter.” “WOW!” answers the woman. “Will you give me…
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Q: Why aren’t blondes good cattle herders? A: Because they can’t even keep two calves together.
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A church had a man in the choir who couldn’t sing. Several people hinted to him that he could better serve in other places, but he continued to come to the choir. The choir director became desperate and went to the pastor. “You’ve GOT to get that man out of my choir,” he said. “If you don’t, I’m going to resign. He sings very loudly and off-key! We practice and practice, and he ruins all our presentations. The other choir…
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A blonde was driving one day. She swerves to the left then to the right. Suddenly a police officer pulls her over and askes, “What’s wrong? why do you keep swerving?” The blond replies, “I saw a tree to my right so I swerved to the left, then I saw a tree to my right so I swerved to my left.” Then the police officer says, “MA’M thats your air freshner.”
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