Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Some folks have it, some don’t. Those who have it would be devastated if it were ever cut off. They think that those who don’t have it are somehow inferior. They think it gives them power. They are wrong. Those who don’t have it may agree that it’s an nifty toy, but think it’s not worth the fuss that those who do have it make about it. Still, many of those who don’t have it would like to try it.…
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Taoism: Shit Happens Confucianism: Confucius say, “Shit Happens” Buddhism: If Shit Happens, it isn’t really Shit Zen (Rinzai): What is the sound of Shit Happening? Zen (Soto): Shit just Happens Hinduism: This Shit Happened before Sikhism: Leave our Shit alone Jainism: Don’t accidentally swallow flies and Shit Islam: If Shit Happens, it is the will of Allah Nation of Islam: Don’t take no Shit! Hare Krishna: Shit Happens, Shit Happens, Rama Rama *ding ding* Agnosticism: Does Shit Happen? Atheism: No…
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One day a man named Olaf walks into the office of a headhunter and says, “I WON A DOB!” The headhunter looks up over the top of his glasses and says, “Excuse me?” Once again the man says, “I WON A DOB!” “Oh,” the headhunter says. “You want a job, I see…what is it you do?” The man says, “I’m a Diesel Fitter.” With this the headhunter turns on his laptop and types vigorously to search his computer files in…
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WANTED A tall well-built woman with good reputation, who can cook frog legs, who appreciates a good fuc- schia garden, classic music and tal- king without getting too serious. But please only read lines 1, 3 and 5.
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An old man was a witness in a burglary case. The defense lawyer asked Sam, “Did you see my client commit this burglary?” “Yes,” said Sam, “I saw him plainly take the goods.” The lawyer asks Sam again, “Sam, this happened at night. Are you sure you saw my client commit this crime?” “Yes, says Sam. “I saw him do it.” Then the lawyer asks Sam, “Sam, listen, you are an 80-year-old, and your eyesight is probably bad. Just how…
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1) What did the waiter ask the group of dining Jewish mothers? “Is ANYTHING all right?” 2) Where does a Jewish husband hide money from his wife? Under the vacuum cleaner. 3) How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a light bulb? (Sigh) Don’t bother, I’ll sit in the dark, I don’t want to be a nuisance to anybody. 4) Sam Levy was driving down the road, gets pulled over by a policeman. Walking up to Sam’s car,…
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The Italian virgin Maria had just got married and being a traditional Italian, she was still a virgin. So, on her wedding night, staying at her mother’s house, she was nervous. But her mother reassured her: “Don’t worry, Maria. Tony’s a good man. Go upstairs and he’ll take care of you.” So up she went. When she got upstairs, Tony took off his shirt and exposed his hairy chest. Maria ran downstairs to her mother and says, “Mama, Mama, Tony’s…
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A man walks in to an elevator with a blonde already in it. She looks at him and says T-G-I-F (only letters). He says S-H-I-T (only letters). Then she says again T-G-I-F (only letters). She tries one more time but this time she puts on a great big smile trying to be nice and says, “T-G-I-F.” Then he looks at her and puts on a great big smile too, and says, “S-H-I-T.” She finally decides to tell the man what…
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A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the weekend to gamble. He lost the shirt off his back, and had nothing left but a quarter and the second half of his round trip ticket. If he could just get to the airport he could get himself home. So he went out to the front of the casino where there was a cab waiting. He got in and explained his situation to the cabbie. He promised to send the driver money…
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It was time for Father John’s Saturday night bath, and young nun, Sister Magdalene had prepared the bath water and towels just the way the old nun had instructed. Sister Magdalene was also instructed not to look at Fr. John’s nakedness if she could help it, do whatever he told her to do, and pray. The next morning the old nun asked Sister Magdalene how the Saturday night bath had gone. Oh, sister,” said the young nun dreamily. “I’ve been…
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