Fr john Jokes - page 3

The Reverend John Fuzz…

The Reverend John Fuzz was pastor of a small congregation in a little Pennsylvania town. One day he was walking down Main Street and he happened to notice a female member of his congregation sitting in the town bar, drinking beer. The reverend thought this was sinful and not something a member of his congregation should do, so he walked through the open door of the bar and sat down next to the woman. “Mrs. Fitzgerald,” the reverend said sternly.…

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Dear John Letter

A soldier serving overseas and far from home was very bitter and terribly upset when his girl wrote that she was breaking off their engagement and wanted her photograph back. Being a sort of creative fellow, he went out and collected all the unwanted photographs that he could find from his buddies, bundled them all together and sent them to her with a note stating the following: “Dear Mary, Regret cannot remember which one of these is of you…please keep…

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‘North Country’ Humor from Minnesota

Ole, Lena and Sven were lost in the woods of Northern Minnesota and were becoming desperate, having run out of food several days ago. It was winter, the snow was deep, their situation was looking very bleak. When Ole dug down into the snow to look for nuts, he found an oil lamp and upon rubbing it to get the snow off, a genie came out. The genie says, “I am da great genie of Nordern Minnesooota and I can…

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Funny from the Headlines

Will the Real Dummy Please Stand Up? AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked “intellectual leadership”. He received a $26 million severance package. With a Little Help from Our Friends! Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them, shouting pleas to come out and give himself up… …And What Was…

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Johnny’s Magic

Little Johnny is walking down the laneway one morning with something cupped in his hands. An old farmer sitting on the porch sees him coming and wonders what he is up to. “Hey little Johnny, whatcha got there in your hands?” Johnny replies, “Got me a bullfrog…goin to town to get me a bull.” The old farmer just chuckles. A short while later, here comes Johnny leading a bull. The old farmer scratches his head in amazement. Next day, here…

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Little Johnny

Little Johnny is sitting in a buth at dairy queen all dressed up in his cowboy suit and two guns in his pocket. The waitress walks up to him and asks him what he wants he says : I want a sunday. The waitress ask if he want wip cream .he pulls his guns out of his pockets and says yeah! The waitress asks him if he wants nuts on his sunday he pulls his guns out of his pockets…

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Little Johnny’s First Job

Little Johnny got his first job as a busboy in a restaurant. After a lady spills her drink, she requested little Johnny to clean up her mess. Little Johnny was too busy avoiding work so he never got to her. The lady then found Little Johnny flirting with a young lady at the corner of the restaurant. Angrily she went and said, “Listen, busboy, I thought I told you to clean my mess up.” Frustrated, Little Johnny said, “Geez, lady,…

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Little Johnny & the hat

Little Johnny woke up one morning with the shits, so he asked his his mom if he could stay home. She told him he could stay home from school, but only if he went to the store to get some medicine first. Johnny asked her what would he do if he had to shit on the way there, or on the way back home. She gave him a hat and told him to go in it if he couldn’t wait.…

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Johnny’s Tantrum

As the crowded airliner is about to take off, the peace is shattered by Little Johnny, who picks that moment to throw a wild temper tantrum. No matter what his frustrated, embarrassed mother does to try to calm him down, Little Johnny continues to scream furiously and kick the seats around him. Suddenly, from the rear of the plane, an elderly man in the uniform of an Air Force General is seen slowly walking forward up the aisle. Stopping the…

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Johnny Learns Anatomy

“For today’s science class, we’ll be looking at anatomy. I’ve brought in this dead cat so we can all have a look at how it functions,” started the science teacher. The teacher asks a bright young student sitting in the front row, “Can you tell me how the cat’s teeth stay in, young man?” “Sure! Its gums hold them in!” replies the kid. “Ok, someone else, how about the fur?” “Its skin holds it on!” replies another bright student. “Ok,…

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