Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A priest and a rabbi walked into a bar. After sitting down, ordering, and some chit chat, the priest said, “Have you noticed that there are no women in this bar?” He then realized the truth, “I think we’re in a gay bar.” A man approached and tried to flirt with the priest. The priest was dumbfounded, and didn’t know quite what to do. The rabbi leaned over and whispered something in the man’s ear. The man nodded and walked…
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Frequently Asked Questions About Health Care Q. What does HMO stand for? A. This is actually a variation of the phrase, “Hey, Moe!” Its roots go back to a concept pioneered by Doctor Moe Howard, who discovered that a patient could be made to forget about the pain in his foot if he was poked hard enough in the eyes. Modern practice replaces the physical finger poke with hi-tech equivalents such as voice mail and referral slips, but the result…
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Two friends were playing golf when one pulled out a cigar, but he didn’t have a lighter, so he asked his friend if he had one. “I sure do,” he replied and reached into his golf bag and pulled out a 12-inch Bic lighter. “Wow!” said his friend, “where did you get that monster?” “I got it from my genie.” “You have a genie?” he asked. “Yes, he’s right here in my golf bag.” “Could I see him?” He opens…
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There’s this guy who forgets his coat somewhere and forgot where. He goes to the store and finds out a replacement coat cost $250 bucks. Astonished he goes to a church to sit and think what to do. He enters the church and hears the sermon going on. As he passes the coat rack he sees a coat identical to his own. He plots to wait for the end of the sermon then to make off with the coat. He…
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Pepito is at home doing his Math homework. Pepito: “Two plus five the son of a b**** is seven. Three plus six the son of a b**** is nine”. In that moment, his mother comes in. Mother: “But Pepito, what are you doing?! Why are you saying that?!” Pepito: “I’m doing my Math homework, Mom”. Mother: “And is that what your teacher taught you?” Pepito: “Yes” Next day, the mother, worried about the education her son is receiving, goes to…
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Five-year-old Timmy is playing with scissors in nursery, and he cuts himself. He rushes to the teacher. “Miss, miss! I’ve cut my hand! I need some cider, miss!” “Cider?!” cries the teacher, horrified, “Why on Earth do you want that, Timmy?” “Well,” explains the boy, “my big sister says that whenever she gets a prick in her hand she puts it in cider.”
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A guy gets set up on a blind date, and he takes her out for dinner to a very expensive restaurant to make a good impression. The waiter approaches the table and asks to take their order. The lady begins ordering practically everything on the menu–shrimp cocktail, pate, Caesar salad, lobster, crepes suzette–with no regard to the prices. The guy is getting very upset, as he never thought she would order so much. She then stops and looks across at…
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A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense: “My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish the whole individual for an offense committed by his limb.” “Well put,” the judge replied. “Using your logic, I sentence the defendant’s arm to one year’s imprisonment. He can accompany it or not, as he chooses.” The defendant smiled.…
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If you were buying candy and you had your choice of the following, which one would you choose? 1. BABY RUTH 2. 3 MUSKETEERS 3. BUTTER FINGER 4. SNICKERS 5. HERSHEY’S 6. ALMOND JOY 7. CLARK BAR 8. GOOD’N’PLENTY 9. ENERGY BAR 10. CHOCOLATE COVERED RAISINS OK — Now that you have chosen, here’s what research says about you: Don’t scroll down until you’ve made your choice! No, you can’t change your mind once you scroll! So think carefully! :…
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If your goal in life is to do as little as possible, and you get away with that…does that make you successful? If love is blind and marriage is an institution, does that mean that marriage is an institution for the blind? If you can buy more memory for your computer…why can’t people? What does an imperfect stranger look like? The term “free gift” never made sense to me…has anybody ever said to you…”I bought you a gift, now that…
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