Dun Jokes - page 4

Considering All Possibilities

Dancer Isadora Duncan once suggested to Irish playwright George Bernard Shaw that eugenics indicated they should have a child together. “Think of it! With my body and your brains, what a wonder it would be,” she said. Shaw replied, “Yes, but what if it had my body and your brains?”

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeConsidering All Possibilities

Who REALLY Invented the Internet

An old, bearded shepherd, with a crooked staff, walks up to a stone pulpit and says… And lo it came to pass that the trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot. And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she had been called Amazon Dot Com. And she said unto Abraham, her husband, “Why doth thou travel far, from town to…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeWho REALLY Invented the Internet

More Chinese In 5 Minutes

English Phrase/(Chinese Phrase): I think you need a facelift/(Chin Tu Fat) Are you hiding a fugitive?/(Hu Yu Hai Ding?) See me A.S.A.P./(Kum Hai Nao) Stupid man/(Dum Gai) Small Horse/(Tai Ni Po Ni) Did you go to the beach?/(Wai Yu So Tan?) I bumped into a coffe table/(Ai Bang Mai Ni) It’s very dark in here/(Wai So Dim?) Has your flight been delayed?/(Hao Long Wai Ting?) An unauthorized execution/(Lin Ching) I thought you were on a diet/(Wai Yu Mun Ching?) This…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeMore Chinese In 5 Minutes

Cowboy without a Horse

A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen. He goes back into the bar, handily flips his gun into the air, catches it above his head without even looking and fires a shot into the ceiling. “WHICH ONE OF YOU SIDEWINDERS STOLE MY HORSE?” he yelled with surprising forcefulness.…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeCowboy without a Horse

Yo mamma — THE LIST

YO MAMMA IS SO FAT ?Yo momma so fat her nickname is “DAMN!” ?Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. ?Yo momma so fat we’re in her right now ?Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise ?Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone ?Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors ?Yo mamma so fat you have to roll over twice to get off…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeYo mamma — THE LIST

Keep Your Eye on the Ball

“How was your golf game, dear?” asked Jack’s wife, Edna. “Well, I was hitting pretty well, but my eyesight’s gotten so bad I couldn’t see where the ball went.” “Well, you’re seventy-five years old, Jack!” admonished his wife. “Why don’t you take my brother, Ronald, along the next time you play?” “But he’s EIGHTY-FIVE and doesn’t even PLAY golf anymore,” protested Jack. “But he’s got perfect eyesight after his cataract surgery. He could watch your ball,” Edna pointed out. So…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeKeep Your Eye on the Ball

Lost In The Translation

In the Beginning was The Plan And then came the Assumptions And the Assumptions were without form and the Plan was completely without substance and the darkness was upon the face of the workers and they spoke among themselves, saying “It is a crock of shit, and it stinketh to high heaven.” And the workers went unto their Supervisors and sayeth, “It is a pail of dung and none may abide the odor thereof.” And the Supervisors went unto their…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeLost In The Translation

Coffee Is Better

Listed below are overwhelming reasons that coffee is better than a woman: 1. A cup of coffee looks good in the morning. 2. You won’t get arrested for ordering coffee at 3 AM. 3. You won’t fall asleep after a cup of coffee. 4. You can always warm coffee up. 5. You can take black coffee home to your parents. 6. You can make coffee as sweet as you want. 7. You can smoke while drinking coffee. 8. Coffee smells…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeCoffee Is Better

SUPERMARKET TRAINING

A very dumb man applies for a job at the supermarket. He gets the job. The first day his training started. His boss said “I’ll pretend to be the customer and you make a sale to me.” “Okay, let’s start. Excuse me sir, but how much are these oranges?” “Umm…I dunno,” replied the trainee lamely. “No, no, no! You’re supposed to say, ‘A dollar seventy-five’!” scolded the boss. “Let’s try again.” “Excuse me sir, but how much are these oranges?”…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeSUPERMARKET TRAINING