Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Did you hear that they caught the Lone Ranger? They took off his mask, put him up on a horse, and then put a noose around his neck. Before they hanged him, they asked him if he had any last requests… He said “yes” and that he would like a big cigar to smoke! Well, they gave him one and he began to smoke and puff, and puff and smoke. Just then one of the cowboys from the back of…
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There was this happily married couple that decided to have a baby. After nine hard long months the mother finally started having contractions and it was time to go to the hospital. The mother was really scared of all the pain she was going to go through so she told the doctors that she wanted all the drugs she could get. The head doctor said, “We have designed a new device that transfers the pain from the mother of the…
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A guy sat on his toilet one day so hard, that he broke the seat in half. So he pulled out the super glue, and left it to dry. Five minutes later, his girlfriend walked in, and took a seat. When she tried to sit up, of course, she got stuck, so in a panic, the guy called 911. “The fire fighters are on their way!” he screamed to her. “Well they can’t just see me like THIS!” she cried.…
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Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts. If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation? Just think how much deeper the ocean would be if sponges didn’t live there. If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose? (Jared: what do you think?) Whatever happened to preparations A through G? If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from? I went…
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A cowboy was riding the range and as he rounded a bend in the road, his horse balked at a huge rattlesnake in the road. As he drew his colt and was ready to shoot, the snake yelled, “Stop..I am a charmed snake and if you don’t shoot me I’ll grant you three wishes.” Somewhat shaken, he holstered his revolver and said, “OK, let’s see what you can do”. The cowboy said, “I’ve been working really hard all my life,…
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Out for a walk one afternoon, I came upon a fence around this cow pasture. On this fence was a sign that stated, “Beware of the BULL.” Now I am not one to doubt the warnings on signs, but it did seem to be a shortcut across the pasture to where I wanted to go. I looked very carefully in every direction and no BULL did I see. Weighing the decision very carefully, it seemed that crossing this cow pasture…
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*Why do Bees hum? Because they don’t know the words. *Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don’t work. *What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A Woolly Jumper. *Why do birds fly south in autumn? Because it is too far to walk. *What is yellow and very dangerous? Sharkinfested custard. *What has an eye and doesn’t cry? A needle. * When does Thursday come before Wednesday? In a dictionary. *What has wings and…
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What’s the difference between P.M.S. and B.S.E? One’s mad cows disease, and the other one is an agricultural problem.
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It’s Harold’s first day in the car pool. They honk the horn in front of his house and he comes running out. He gets about halfway down the walkway when he hears a grunt and the sound of his wife’s foot tapping on the porch. He turns around and there she is, scowling at him. He runs back to the steps, spreads her bathrobe, bends over, kisses her on the privates, runs back down the walkway and hops in the…
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There was a frog with a really big mouth travelling around one day. He came to a barn and saw a cow. “HELLO COW, WHAT DO YOU FEED YOUR BABIES?” The cow replied, “Milk.” The frog nodded. “OH, IS THAT SO.” He then hopped along to a fence and saw a horse. “HELLO, HORSE, WHAT DO YOU FEED YOUR BABIES?” The horse replied,”Hay.” The frog nodded, “OH, IS THAT SO.” He then hopped along to the river and he saw…
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