Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Two Lovers plan to commit Suicide. They were going to jump off of a cliff. The boy jumped first. The Girl closed her eyes before jumping then changed her mind saying Love is Blind. The Boy, in mid-air opened his parachute saying Love never Dies
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Yo Mama so fat she has her own area code. Yo Mama so fat she had to make a bra out of two parachutes. Yo Mama so fat she can be on three continents at once. Yo Mama so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phone book.
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Cowboy Joe was telling his fellow cowboys back on the ranch about his first visit to a big-city church. “When I got there, they had me park my old truck in the corral,” Joe began. “You mean the parking lot,” interrupted Charlie, a more worldly fellow. “I walked up the trail to the door,” Joe continued. “The sidewalk to the door,” Charlie corrected him. “Inside the door, I was met by this dude,” Joe went on. “That would be the…
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Children’s books that never quite made it into circulation “You Are Different and That’s Bad” “Dad’s New Wife Timothy” “Pop! Goes The Hamster….And Other Great Microwave Games” “Testing Homemade Parachutes Using Household Pets” “The Hardy Boys, the Barbie Twins, and the Vice Squad” “Babar Meets the Taxidermist” “Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence” “The Boy Who Died from Eating All His Vegetables” “Start a Real-Estate Empire With the Change From Your Mom’s Purse” “The Pop-up Book of Human Anatomy” “Things…
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Someone I know found this joke for me. It made me laugh so it might work on you! Ghost Poopie- The kind where you feel the poopie come out, but there’s no poopie in the toilet. Clean Poopie- The kind where you poopie it out, see it in the toilet, but there’s nothing on the toilet paper. Wet Poopie- The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet…
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Cindy Crawford, Ivana Trump, and Whoopi Goldberg are on a plane. The Announcement system clicks to life and the voice of the captain rings through the cabin… “Ladies and gentilemen, I am afaraid the plane has just had a major mechanical failure, and is going to crash. There are only enough parachutes for the crew and myself, and we have already used them – – This is a recording.” Everyone on the plane begins to panic! People are yelling and…
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The skydiving instructor was going through the question and answer period with his new students when one of them asked the usual question always asked: “If our chute doesn’t open, and the reserve doesn’t open, how long would we have till we hit the ground?” The jump master looked at him and, in perfect deadpan, answered: “The rest of your life.”
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A doctor, a lawyer, a little boy scout and a pastor were out for a Sunday afternoon flight on a small private plane. Suddenly, the plane developed engine trouble. In spite of the best efforts of the pilot, the plane started to go down. Finally, the pilot grabbed a parachute, yelled to the passengers that they had better jump, and bailed out. Unfortunately there were only three parachutes remaining. The doctor grabbed one and said “I’m a doctor, I save…
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If Con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing? Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to? If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too? If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it? If you’re born again, do you have two bellybuttons?…
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I glanced under the seat of the aircraft I was on and saw a life jacket, and thought, “Fuck me, the ferries must have the parachutes!”
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