Cho Jokes - page 14

50 Reasons to be a Woman

1.Free drinks. 2.Free dinners. 3.Free movies (you get the point). 4.You can hug your friend without wondering if she thinks you’re gay. 5.You can hug your friend without wondering if YOU’RE gay. 6.You know ‘The Truth’ about whether size matters. 7.Speeding ticket? What’s that? 8.New lipstick gives you a whole new lease on life. 9.You never had to walk down the hall with your binder strategically positioned in high school. 10.If you have sex with someone and don’t call them…

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Read Joke50 Reasons to be a Woman

Too Much Coffee

You’ve Had Too Much Coffee When… You ski uphill. You answer the door before people knock. Juan Valdez has named his donkey after you. You haven’t blinked since the last lunar eclipse. You grind your coffee beans in your mouth. You just completed another sweater and you don’t know how to knit. You sleep with your eyes open. You have to watch videos in fast-forward. You lick your coffee pot clean. You spend your vacations visiting “Maxwell House”. Your eyes…

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Read JokeToo Much Coffee

Thoughts from Mom

If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried. A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer. Everyone has a photographic memory; some don’t have film. The universe is a figment of its own imagination. If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn? Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives. There are three kinds of people: Those who can count; those who can’t. Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard…

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Some interesting facts

Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated. Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite. The national anthem of Greece has 158 verses. No one in Greece has memorized all 158 verses. There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar. The average secretary’s left hand does 56% of the typing. A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes. There are more chickens than people in the world. Two-thirds of the world’s eggplant is grown in…

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Little Johnny is in Love!!

The pretty teacher was concerned with one of her young students so she took him aside after class one day. “Little Johnny, why has your school work been so poor lately?” “I’m in love,” replied Little Johnny. Holding back an urge to smile, the teacher asked, “With whom?” “With you!” he said. “But Little Johnny,” said the teacher gently, “don’t you see how silly that is? Sure I’d like a husband of my own someday… but I don’t want a…

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Read JokeLittle Johnny is in Love!!

Flight to Egypt

Susie Sunshine asked her Sunday School Class to draw pictures of their favorite Bible stories. She was puzzled by Little Johnny’s picture, which showed four people on an airplane, so she asked him which story it was meant to represent. “The Flight to Egypt,” said Johnny. “I see. . . And that must be Mary, Joseph, and Baby Jesus,”she said. “But who’s the fourth person?” “Oh, that’s Pontius — the pilot!”

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Read JokeFlight to Egypt

My e-mail is bigger than your e-mail

Eleven reasons e-mail is like a male reproductive organ: 11. Those who have it would be devastated if it was ever cut off. 10. Those who have it think that those who don’t are somehow inferior. 9. Those who don’t have it may agree that it’s neat, but think it’s not worth the fuss that those who have it make about it. 8. Many of those who don’t have it would like to try it, a phenomenon psychologists call *E-Mail…

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Read JokeMy e-mail is bigger than your e-mail

Hotel

One day a little girl was sitting in class when her teacher asked her to make a sentence with each word she told her to. The first word was red, so the little girl replied, “I have a red dress.” The teacher said good, your next word is nacho. The little girl replied, “I have a red dress and it’s nacho’s.” The teacher said not quite, but okay, your next word is hotel. The little girl replied, “I have a…

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What Price Pork

There was this Rabbi in a small town, and he was really curious about why so many people ate pork. He wanted to try some, but there was nowhere in town he could go and not be seen. One weekend, he made an excuse and traveled to a distant town, went into a restaurant and ordered the first pork item on the menu. While he’s waiting for his order of pork, the president of his congregation walks in. He sees…

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Two Words I Do Not Understand

A kid comes home from school and says to his mom, “Mom I’ve got a problem.” She says “Tell me.” He tells her that the boys at school are using 2 words he doesn’t understand. She asks him what they are. He says, “Well, pussy and bitch”. She says, “Oh, that’s no big deal, pussy is a cat like our little Mittens, and bitch is a female dog like our Sandy”. He thanks her and goes to visit dad in…

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Read JokeTwo Words I Do Not Understand