Business trip Jokes - page 2

a man who did the stupidest thing

A man traveling by plane and in urgent need to use the mens room is nervously tapping his foot on the floor of the aircraft. Each time he tried the mensroom door, it was “OCCUPIED”. The stewardess, aware of his predicament suggested that he go ahead and use the ladies room, but cautioned him against using any of the buttons inside. The buttons were marked “WW, WA, PP and ATR”. Making the mistake that so many men make in disregarding…

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How Little Johnny Got His New Bike…

Little Johnny’s father just comes home from a long business trip. He finds Little Johnny riding a very fancy new 10-speed bike. He asks Little Johnny, “Where did you get the money for the bike? It must have cost $300.” “Easy, Dad…,” Little Johnny replies. “I earned it from hiking.” “Come on,” his father says. “Tell me the truth.” “That is the truth,” insists Little Johnny. “Every night you were gone, Mr. Reynolds from the grocery store would come over…

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Home Coming

Several years ago, I returned home from a business trip just when a storm hit, with crashing thunder and severe lightning. As I came into my bedroom about 2 AM, I found my two children in bed with my wife, Stacey, apparently scared by the loud storm. I resigned myself to sleep in the guest bedroom that night. The next day, I talked to the kids, explaining that it was “OK” to sleep with Mom when the storm was bad,…

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stupid hubby

A man returns home early from a business trip to find his wife in bed with another man. He yells, “What on earth are you doing?!!” The wife then turns to the other man and says, “See I told you he was stupid.”

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BLONDE SECRETARY

A blonde secretary joins her boss on a business trip. They arrive the night before and stay in a hotel. She is told to meet him at the meeting at 9:00am the next day. One and a half hours into the meeting the boss calls his secretary to find out why she has not shown up? The boss: “You are 1 1/2 hours late! Why are you not here?” The secretary: “Well I am having a little bit of trouble…

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The World is Populated by Idiots

1. Police in Wichita, Kansas, arrested a 22-year-old man at an airport hotel after he tried to pass two (counterfeit) $16 bills. 2. A man in Johannesburg, South Africa, shot his 49-year-old friend in the face, seriously wounding him, while the two practiced shooting beer cans off each other’s head. 3. A company trying to continue its five-year perfect safety record showed its workers a film aimed at encouraging the use of safety goggles on the job. According to Industrial…

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payback time

A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the weekend to gamble. He lost the shirt off his back, and had nothing left but a quarter and the second half of his round trip ticket. If he could just get to the airport he could get himself home. So he went out to the front of the casino where there was a cab waiting. He got in and explained his situation to the cabbie. He promised to send the driver money…

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The Duffle Bag

A bus, making it’s daily trip, stopped to pick up an older lady. The lady was carrying a big duffle back and she had it clutched to herself as if she was trying to protect it. She walked to the back of the bus and sat down. Two younger men saw the dufflebag she was clutching and one of them said, “Excuse me, but what’s in the duffle bag. The lady responded, “IT’S NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS!” The man…

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A Wife and a Mistress

Feeling a bit paranoid, a rich businessman decided to test the fidelity of his wife and his mistress by putting them both on the same cruise ship vacation in the Caribbean. He booked two adjacent rooms for the two women and then begged off from accompanying them because of business concerns. Once the cruise trip ended, he would question his wife and his mistress separately on each other’s behavior during the cruise without letting on about their relationship with him.…

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Some interesting facts

Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated. Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite. The national anthem of Greece has 158 verses. No one in Greece has memorized all 158 verses. There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar. The average secretary’s left hand does 56% of the typing. A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes. There are more chickens than people in the world. Two-thirds of the world’s eggplant is grown in…

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