Zen Pizza
What did the Zen Buddist Monk say to the pizza chef? “Make me one with everything”
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
What did the Zen Buddist Monk say to the pizza chef? “Make me one with everything”
A mother was reading a book about animals to her three year old daughter. Mother: “What does the Cow say?” Child: “Mooo.” Mother: “Very Good! Now what does the Cat say?” Child: “Meow.” Mother: “Ohh you’re so smart, now what does the frog say?” And this little 3 year old girl looked up at her mother and replied, “Bud.”
There were these three hunters that were fixing to go hunting in a familiar part of the woods. The first man set up while the other two still hunted. The first hunter was sitting in his tree when he got cold and sleepy. He got him a dip of Skoal and realized he had to take a shit. He didn’t want to climb down so he just shit over the side. He then fell asleep. The other two hunters killed…
Did you hear that the Republicans and the Democrats in Washington are contemplating passing a bill that balances the budget? It may not be funny, but it sure is a joke!
There were these 3 guys on a boat. The boat hit a rock and sank. The 3 guys swam to this island. They went on their daily swim and found a magic lamp. The guy took it back to the island and rubbed the lamp. A genie came out and said to the 3 of them,”Since there are three of you I will give you each one wish.” The first guy says,”I’ve been on this island for 50 years and…
“I’ve had it with my wife,” said one drinking buddy to the other. “I’m filing for an annulment.” “Sorry to hear that, Pal, said his partner. “May I ask why?” “I found her supply of birth control pills,” said the first. “Listen, Frank, with all due respect to your religion, I just can’t see leaving your wife for what the Church says is a sin.” “It ain’t just that,” stormed Frank. “I had a vasectomy over five years ago.”
Thursday’s Schedule for the new Fall Television season: NBC 8:00 Friends 8:30 Girlfriends 9:00 One Guy with Several Female Friends 9:30 My Gay Friends FOX 8:00 Real Humans in Real Pain 8:30 Feral Dingoes Eating Children on Tape 9:00 Jiggle It Beach 9:30 LA Chicks 10:00 Beverly Hills 90210: The 90,210th Episode UPN 8:00 The Unwatchables 8:30 Voyage To The Bottom Of The Ratings 9:00 Theoretically Existing Show 9:30 Praying For Syndication 10:00 The Last Thing You’d Ever Want To…
If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb. (Now that’s more like it!) The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps outward to squirt blood 30 feet. A pig’s orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. (Lucky Pig!) Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. (Still not over that pig thing!) Humans, whales and dolphins are the only species that have sex for…
Two blondes were sitting in a booth at a local restaurant when, they overheard a man telling his buddy “stupid blonde” jokes. Then, one blonde said to the other, “I hate people that think all blondes are stupid. Because, I think I’m a really smart blonde.” Then the other blonde said, “Prove that guy wrong. Go home and learn all the capitals to all the states. And we’ll come back and prove him wrong.” So, the blonde went home and…
A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won’t cross the street to vote in a national election. We yell for the Government to balance the budget, then take the last dime we have to make the down payment on a car that will take 5 years to pay off. We demand speed laws that will stop fast driving, then won’t buy a car if it can’t go over 100 miles an hour. We know…