Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
If you are not a computer geek, you may not get this one. I built my first pc last week, I am very proud of it. I have a 350 mhz AMD K- 2 cpu, a 100 mhz system board, 512k l2 cache, 64 meg sdram dimms chip, a 6.4 gig hard drive with 512k cache and ultra dma/33, a 40x and a 40x cdrom. I would love to tell you about the performance, but I am still waiting for…
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The other day I went into the local religious book store where I saw a “Honk if you love Jesus” bumper sticker. I bought it and put it on the back bumper of my car and I’m really glad I did. What an uplifting experience followed! I was stopped at a light at a busy intersection, just lost in thoughts of the Lord and I didn’t notice that the light had changed. That bumper sticker really worked! I found lots…
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One day this guy was driving a truck with his new pet parrot. He sees a hitch-hiker and pulls over to pick her up, but right before the girl gets in, the parrot says, “No fuck, no ride!” Horrified, the girl runs away. The truck driver says to the parrot, “That wasn’t nice!” He sees another girl goes to pick her up and the same thing happens. This time the truck driver says, “If you do that one more time…
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Can you imagine the first cow ever made? It would look at itself and say ‘omigod, look at me! I’m huge! I’ve got big, bulging muscles, I’ve got sharp things jabbing out the top of my head. I could kill any other animal in the kingdom. I’m gonna run to the top of this hill and let out a roar that’s gonna make every other animal in the kingdom wet themselves! Mooooooooooo’.
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Man walks into a bar. This man is carring a big, black, briefcase type of bag. He sits down at the bar and orders a drink. He removes a thimble from his pocket, pours a little of his drink in this thimble, and puts the thimble inside the bag. Bartender gets a little nosey, and asks what’s in the bag. Man holds up his finger as if to say “wait”, and begins to open the case at the top. He…
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A man walked into a bar with a duck under his arm,and the bartender said”Sorry Sir, no pets allowed.” The man replied”But this is a special duck, this is Chuck the Duck” The bartender was puzzled”why is this duck so special?” The man asked if the bartender had a match,the bartender handed the man a match. The man lit the match and placed it under Chuck’s right wing, and Chuck started singing “Jingle Bells”. The man asked for another match,…
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CLINTON VIRUS Gives you a 7 Inch Hard Drive with NO memory. VIAGRA VIRUS Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy. LEWINSKY VIRUS Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then emails everyone about what it did. RONALD REAGAN VIRUS Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored. MIKE TYSON VIRUS Quits after two bytes. OPRAH WINFREY VIRUS Your 300 MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 100 MB, then slowly expands to 200MB. DR. JACK…
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This letter was started by a woman like yourself in the hopes of bringing relief to other tired and discontented women. Unlike most chain letters, this one does not cost anything. Just send a copy of this letter to five friends who are equally frustrated, then bundle up your husband or boyfriend, and send him to the woman whose name appears at the top of the list, and add your name to the bottom of the list. When your name…
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A golfer was taken to the police station for questioning. “Mr. Smith, I am Detective O’Reilly. Would you mind telling me what happened out there?” “We were on the 1st hole. Dorothy went up to the women’s tee while I prepared to hit. I carefully gauged my swing and let one rip. It was a beautiful low liner but it had a slight hook. It struck Dorothy smack dab in the back of her head. I took off running but…
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A petient goes to his G.P. with an embarrassing flatulence problem. He tells his Doctor that he has a farting disorder which he cannot control. He farts in the most inappropriate of places – in subways, restaurants, libraries. The farts happen inadvertently and is unmanageable. After hearing the details, the Doctor says “OK, here’s what I’ll do. I’ll stick my finger up your bum and feel around to see what the cause of the problem maybe”. “OK Doc, but can…
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