Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A business man got on an elevator in a building. When he entered the elevator, there was a blonde already inside and she greeted him by saying, “T-G-I-F”. He smiled at her and replied, “S-H-I-T.” She looked at him, puzzled, and said, “T-G-I-F” again. He acknowledged her remark again by answering, “S-H-I-T.” The blond was trying to be friendly, so she smiled her biggest smile and said as sweetly as possibly “T-G-I-F” another time. The man smiled back to her…
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. Her husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, “Shut up…you’re next!”
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An airoplane is about to crash land. The pilot yells over the intercom to the passengers to throw something out the window so that the crash won’t be as bad. A young irish blonde throws out a case o whisky, a big english bloke lobs out a case o cigs and an Iraq phsyco throws out a bomb. Five minutes later a women is walking along a street. She see’s a little girl crying. “What’s the matter dear?” she asks.…
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An old guy comes home in the middle of the day and finds his young blonde wife standing in the middle of their deluxe apartment wearing a red G-string and 7 inch steel heels, and the whole apartment is flooded. “What happened here?” he asks. “I think the waterbed’s busted,” says the trembling wife. Just then a naked guy floats by. “Who’s that?” demands the husband. “I dunno. Must be a lifeguard.”
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There are 3 women at an interview for NASA, a blonde a brunet and a redhead. First, the brunet goes in and the man asks her, “If you could go to any planet, where would you go and why?” She answers, “Saturn so I could see the rings.” Next comes the redhead and is asked the same quetion. She replies, “Jupiter, because I love the color red!” Finally the blonde comes in and is also asked the same question. She…
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The Baltimore Police Department, famous for its superior K-9 unit, was somewhat taken back by this recent incident. Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on all channels and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond. The K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a tight leash. The woman ran out…
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A guy is walking in a park and sees this good looking blonde sitting at a park bench petting a dog. He walks up to her and says, “Does your dog bite?” She says, “No, my dog doesn’t bite.” So, he bent down to pet the dog and it lunged at him. The man said, “Hey, I thought you said your dog doesn’t bite!” The blonde replies, “This isn’t my dog.”
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This guy is walking through ChinaTown. He is fascinated with all the Chinese Restaurants, the Chinese shops, the Chinese signs and banners on the buildings. He is having the best time just walking and looking. He turns a corner and sees a building with a sign, “Hans Olafsen’s Laundry”. “Hans Olaffsen?”, he thinks. “How in the world does that fit in here?” So, he walks into the shop and sees an old Chinese gentleman sitting in the corner. The visitor…
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At this pharmacy, a blonde woman asked to use the infant scale to weigh the baby she was holding. The clerk explained that it was out for repairs, but said that she would figure the infant’s weight by weighing the woman and baby together on the adult scale, then weighing the mother alone and subtracting the second amount from the first. “It won’t work,” countered the blonde. “Why not?” asked the clerk. “I’m not the mother; I’m the aunt.”
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A blonde woman goes to see her Podiatrist. She says, “Doc, I just got back from a few weeks in the Bahamas, and the weather was so great that I spent most of the days just lying on the sand. But the strangest thing happened. Whenever a good-looking guy came by, I would get this strange tingling sensation between my toes.” The podiatrist thought this was kind of unusual and examined her. He asked her if she had this sensation…
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