Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Two moose hunters from Texas are flown into a remote lake in Alaska. They have a good hunt, and both manage to get a large moose. When the plane returns to pick them up, the pilot looks at the animals and says, “This little plane won’t lift all of us, the equipment, and both of those animals – you’ll have to leave one. We’d never make it over the trees on the take off.” “That’s baloney”, says one of the…
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A lady is sitting in a roadhouse bar drinking; when she asks the bartender where the bathroom is located. The bartender tells her that the toilets broken, but she can go out back and squat next to the dumpster if she wants. The lady has been drinking pretty heavily so she staggers out back. She pulls her panties down and relieves herself, but she is so drunk she passes out . A trucker who has been on the road for…
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A minister dies and is waiting in line at the Pearly Gates. Ahead of him is a guy who’s dressed in sunglasses, a loud shirt, leather jacket and jeans. Saint Peter addresses this guy, “Who are you, so that I may know whether or not to admit you to the Kingdom of Heaven?” The guy replies, “I’m Joe Cohen, taxi-driver, of Noo Yawk City.” Saint Peter consults his list. He smiles and says to the taxi-driver, “Take this silken robe…
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At 3 am a desk clerk at a hotel gets a call from a drunk guy asking what time the bar opens. “It opens at noon,” answers the clerk. About an hour later he gets a call from the same guy, sounding even drunker. “What time does the bar open?” he asks. “Same time as before, Noon,” replies the clerk. Another hour passes and he calls again, plastered. “Whenjoo shay the bar opinsh at?” The clerk then answers, “It opens…
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A guy walks into the pub and orders 5 large glasses of beer. Before the barman can blink they’re gone. 1 2 3 4 5! The barman looks at him and says, “Wow, you sure downed those quick!” The man says, “Well you’d drink that fast too if you had what I’ve got.” “And what’s that?” the barman asked “Twenty Cents.”
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There would be a “Rehearsal Dinner Kegger” until the cops showed up. Bridesmaids would wear matching blue jean cutoffs and halter tops. They would have NO tan lines and more skin showing than not. Tuxes would have team logos on the back and the Nike shoes would have matching team colors. June weddings would be scheduled around basketball play-offs. Vows would mention cooking and sex specifically, but omit that “forsaking all others” part. The couple would leave the ceremony in…
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In a very crowded bus, one busy Monday morning, a passenger unable to resist an urge releases it silently, but the smell gets so bad that the people in the bus had to get out. The passengers, who were very annoyed asked the driver to send off the person responsible for the stinking act, but they were unable to point out who it was since everybody was accusing somebody. The accusations became very unorganised and the commotion attracted a big…
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There’s a guy with a Doberman Pinscher and a guy with a Chihuahua. The guy with the Doberman Pinscher says to the guy with a Chihuahua, “Let’s go over to that restaurant and get something to eat.” The guy with the Chihuahua says, “We can’t go in there. We’ve got dogs with us.” The guy with the Doberman Pinscher says, “Just follow my lead.” They walk over to the restaurant, the guy with the Doberman Pinscher puts on a pair…
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Dear Jenny, Ann Landers wouldn’t print this. I have nowhere else to turn. I have to get the word out. Warn other parents. I must be rambling on. Let me try and explain. It’s about my son, Billy. He’s always been a good, normal ten-year-old boy. Well, last spring we sat down after dinner to select a summer camp for Billy. We sorted through the camp brochures. There were the usual camps with swimming, canoeing, games, singing by the campfire,…
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This was on The Tonight Show September 7, 1999 Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The following won. She said it was snowing and cold and the guy took her skiing. It was just a day trip. They had never been out together before. The day went OK until they were coming back that afternoon. They were driving home and she suddenly had to pee urgently, but still…
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