Ass 6 Jokes - page 6

1. When you’re playing the piano, you frequently lose your grip on the bow. 2. You go to bed and accidentally fluff up your head. 3. You’re absolutely convinced nostalgia is a thing of the past. 4. You go to bed and purposely fluff up your head. 5. You purchase season tickets to the Super Bowl. 6. You have trouble picking your shadow out of a crowd. 7. You’ve caught yourself waving “Goodbye” instead of “Hello” when answering the telephone.…

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1. Stick your open palm under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, “May I borrow a highlighter?” 2. Say, “uh oh, I knew I shouldn’t have put my lips on that.” 3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise. 4. Say, “Dang, this water’s cold.” 5. Drop a marble and say, “Oh crap! My glass eye!” 6. Say, “Hmmmm, I’ve never seen that color before.” 7. Grunt and strain real loud…

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1. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times… 2. The names contained in this report have been changed to protect the innocent… 3. The mayor then made an illegal left hand turn onto Mulraney at which point I opened fire… 4. Before I get into the details, I’ve got a few “shout-outs” for my homeys in the command staff… 5. It was so dark and wet that night you could almost eat the mist. The…

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1.At dinner, guard your plate with fork and steak knife, so as to give the impression that you’ll stab anyone, including the waiter, who reaches for it. 2.Collect the salt shakers from all of the tables in the restaurant, and balance them in a tower on your table. 3.Wipe your nose on your date’s sleeve. Twice. 4.Make funny faces at other patrons, then sneer at their reactions. 5.Repeat every third third word you say say. 6.Give your claim to fame…

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