Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
“This is to hep yu’all who don’t have the plesur of livin in the sunny South, which is sometimes covered in ice! Those who do, will wunder why these wus ever wrote down in the furst place.” Sayings in the South: “Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit. “It’s been hotter’n a goat’s butt in a pepper patch.” “Have a cup of coffee, it’s already ‘saucered and blowed.” “It’s so dry, the trees are bribing the dogs.” “My…
(2)
Loading...
1. Stick your open palm under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, “May I borrow a highlighter?” 2. Say, “uh oh, I knew I shouldn’t have put my lips on that.” 3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise. 4. Say, “Dang, this water’s cold.” 5. Drop a marble and say, “Oh crap! My glass eye!” 6. Say, “Hmmmm, I’ve never seen that color before.” 7. Grunt and strain real loud…
(0)Loading...
A young boy is riding his new bike down the street on Christmas morning. A polieman on a horse says to the boy, “Did Santa bring you that bike?” The boy says,”Yes he did.” the officer then pulls out a ticket and says to the boy, ” Next time tell Santa to put reflectors on that bike.” He then gives the boy the ticket. The boy asks the cop, “Did santa bring you that horse?” going along with the child…
(4)Loading...
Johnny paints a sign: WE MOVE ANYTHING FOR A DIME; then tells his buddy Roy to get his red wagon and both sit under a shade tree in Johnny’s front yard, waiting for business. Kathy, across the street, is not to be outdone: WE MOVE ANYTHING FOR A NICKEL; tells Nellie to get her red wagon and both sit in Kathy’s yard. Johnny’s pissed…how dare that GIRL? Then, a flash…and Johnny hauls Roy across the street & says, “Let’s get…
(0)Loading...
Unbelievable, but these are from a book called “Disorder in the Court.” These are things people actually said in court, word for word: Q: What is your date of birth? A: July fifteenth. Q: What year? A: Every year. ————————————————— Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. ————————————————— Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? A: Yes. Q: And in what ways does it affect your…
(1)Loading...
Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat. The kids were both gone, and my wife was in heat. The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook, It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook. Momma in her teddy, and I in the nude, Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube. When out on the lawn there arose such a cry, That I lost my boner and momma went…
(2)Loading...
There is this young attractive married woman who wants expensive jewelry, designer clothes and fast cars but her husband is not so well off. One day, she comes home late wearing a gold necklace. Her husband, who has been waiting for her, asks, “Where did you get that necklace.” The woman says, “I won it at the bingo.” Three days later, the woman again comes home late wearing a mink coat. Her husband asks, “Where did you get that mink…
(0)Loading...
A cowboy was riding his horse accross his pasture. A snake spooked his horse and bucked the cowboy off. The cowboy cursed at the snake and yelled “Don’t bite me!” The snake said “NO, I’m a genie snake, I can give you three wishes. What would you like me to grant you?” The cowboy thought for a minute. Then said “A million dollars in the bank.” The snake said, “Granted, next.” Again the cowboy thought. Then said “The most beautiful…
(0)Loading...
One day some kids were walking down the street, and they came upon what looked like a puddle of water. They wanted to know what it was for sure, so they got a handkerchief and drug it through the water, and in front of their eyes the handkerchief disappeared. So, they did it again, and again, and everytime it disappeared. So they said we have got some magic water here. We have got to go get the priest. So, the…
(0)Loading...
A man and woman marry after a brief courtship and all is well for a time. Eventually they are blessed with child. The woman’s time comes, and as she is taken into the operating room, she calls the husband over. “Honey, there’s something I really have to tell you. There is as an very old tradition in our families that the oldest living male gets to name any new children born to anyone in the family. That means my brother…
(0)Loading...