Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A salesman’s car breaks down, so he asks a farmer to let him spend the night. The farmer then tells the salesman, “Well, if you’re not picky, you can spend the night in the barn.” The salesman agrees to do so. In the middle of the night, the salesman wakes up and is really thirsty, so he decides to get some milk from a cow. Soon, the farmer hears noises coming from the barn and goes to investigate. Upon entering…
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After tucking their three-year-old son, Sammy, into bed one night, his parents heard sobbing coming from his room. Rushing back in, they found him crying, hysterically. He managed to tell them that he had swallowed a penny, and he was sure he was going to die. No amount of talking helped. His father, an an attempt to calm him down, palmed a penny from his pocket and pretended to pull it from Sammy’s ear. Sammy was delighted. In a flash,…
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A certain lawyer was quite wealthy and had a summer house in the country, to which he retreated for several weeks of the year. Each summer, the lawyer would invite a different friend of his (no,that’s not the punch line) to spend a week or two up at this place, which happened to be in a backwoods section of Maine. On one particular occasion, he invited a Czechoslovakian friend to stay with him. The friend, eager to get a freebie…
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This blonde heard that milk baths would make you beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 15 gallons of milk. When the milkman read the note he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 1.5 gallons, so knocked on the door to clarify the point. The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, “I found your note to leave 15 gallons of milk. Did you mean 15 gallons or 1.5 gallons?”…
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A father was concerned about how his 7 year old son was becoming an habitual liar. He went to see a child psychiatrist and told him about the problem. After hearing all the father had to say, the doctor said,”Go home and tell your son the biggest lie that you can come up with. When he realizes how much of a lie you have just told him, it will break him of the habit.” So the man went home and…
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118. By the end of the party, he’s got every damn kid doing the “pull my finger” trick. 17. Clown car must be started with a Breathalyzer device. 16. Keeps screaming, “My name’s not BO-zo, it’s bo-ZO!” 15. References to Kierkegaard and Nietzsche are lost on most 5-year olds. 14. Props for his “disappearing” trick: a moving van and your wide-screen TV. 13. Scares the holy hell outta the kids during the “Severed Limb” trick. 12. Tells the kids he…
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A middle-aged man is out on a date with a lovely young lady. At the restaurant where they sat having dinner, the young lady asked him. “Have you ever been married? The man says, “Well, yes I was. But, I lost my wife a long time ago.” “How did she die?” asked the young lady. The man replied, “She was eaten by a huge 200 lb pitbull. It’s her own fault, though. She should’ve known how dangerous it was. Why,…
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This is a TRUE story! These people owned a dog and their neighbor, a rabbit. When ever the neighbors put their rabbit outside, the people with a dog would have to bring their dog in. One day the people with the dog came dome and found the dog with a filthy, DEAD, rabbit in its mouth! So they did the only thing they could do, wash it, blow dry it, fluff up the fur and put it back in the…
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TOP TEN REASONS WHY WOMEN REJECT MEN AND WHAT THEY REALLY MEAN 10. I think of you as a brother. (You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in “Deliverance.”) 9. There’s a slight difference in our ages. (You are one jurassic geezer.) 8. I’m not attracted to you in ‘that’ way. (You are the ugliest dork I’ve ever laid eyes upon.) 7. My life is too complicated right now. (I don’t want you spending the whole night or else…
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A young mother was once again pregnant and trying to explain to her little girl how she had got that way. She explained how a baby was growing in her tummy, and how it took and egg and a sperm. Daddy made the sperm, and Mommy made the egg. So the little girl asks, “So if it takes a sperm and an egg to make a baby, and the egg is already in your tummy, then how does the sperm…
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