Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
1) What did the waiter ask the group of dining Jewish mothers? “Is ANYTHING all right?” 2) Where does a Jewish husband hide money from his wife? Under the vacuum cleaner. 3) How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a light bulb? (Sigh) Don’t bother, I’ll sit in the dark, I don’t want to be a nuisance to anybody. 4) Sam Levy was driving down the road, gets pulled over by a policeman. Walking up to Sam’s car,…
(4)
Loading...
ALL I REALLY NEED TO KNOW ABOUT LIFE I LEARNED FROM NOAH’S ARK 1 Don’t miss the boat. 2 Don’t forget we are all in the same boat. 3 Plan ahead, it wasn’t raining when Noah built the Ark. 4 Stay fit-when you are 600 years old, someone might just ask you to do something really big. 5 Don’t listen to critics, just get on with what has to be done. 6 For safety’s sake, travel in pairs. 7 Two…
(0)Loading...
Q: What do you call a handcuffed man? A: Trustworthy. Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? A: You didn’t hold the pillow down long enough. Q: Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven? A: Because if they all went, it would be Hell. Q: Why do men like smart women? A: Opposites attract. Q: How are husbands like lawn mowers? A: They’re hard to…
(3)Loading...
Today’s woman puts on wigs, fake eyelashes, false fingernails, sixteen pounds of assorted make-up/shadows/blushes/creams, living bras, various pads that would make a linebacker envious, has implants and assorted other surgeries, then complains that she cannot find a “real” man.
(0)Loading...
Q. Do you know why God gave women legs? A. So they don’t leave trails like slugs.
(0)Loading...
Men, the next time you go to the public toilets, you may observe one of the following types of vistors: Excitable Type: Pants are twisted, cannot find hole, rips pants in anger. Sociable Type: Joins pals for a piss whether he wants one or not. Timid Type: Cannot pee if anyone is watching, pretends he has been and sneaks back later. Nosy Type: Peeps over partition to have a look at the other fellow’s tool. Indifferent Type: All urinals being…
(2)Loading...
You’ve Had Too Much Coffee When… You ski uphill. You answer the door before people knock. Juan Valdez has named his donkey after you. You haven’t blinked since the last lunar eclipse. You grind your coffee beans in your mouth. You just completed another sweater and you don’t know how to knit. You sleep with your eyes open. You have to watch videos in fast-forward. You lick your coffee pot clean. You spend your vacations visiting “Maxwell House”. Your eyes…
(2)Loading...
A lumber jack is at the dentist’s office for a double root canal, for which the dentist insists he must administer laughing gas ans local anesthetics. The lumber jack smiles and proudly declines the laughing gas and anesthetics and says that he can bear the pain. The dentist tells the lumber jack that the procedure is excruciatingly painful and that he has never performed it without the pain killers. Still the lumber jack insists on not receiving the painkillers. The…
(1)Loading...
1. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times… 2. The names contained in this report have been changed to protect the innocent… 3. The mayor then made an illegal left hand turn onto Mulraney at which point I opened fire… 4. Before I get into the details, I’ve got a few “shout-outs” for my homeys in the command staff… 5. It was so dark and wet that night you could almost eat the mist. The…
(0)Loading...
One day a rabbit hops into a bar and says, “Hey bartender, Got any…carrots?” So in response to the rabbit, the bartender says, “No!” and then rabbit leaves. The next day the same rabbit comes in and says, “Hey bartender, got any… carrots?” and then the bartender says, “Listen, rabbit, if you come in here and ask for carrots again, I’m going to nail your ears to the wall!!!” So after that the rabbit leaves the bar. The very next…
(0)Loading...