Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
T’was the night before Chrismas – Old Santa was pissed He cussed out the elves and threw down his list Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks I have good mind to scap the whole works I’ve busted my ass for damn near a year Instead of “Thanks Santa” – whad do i hear The old lady bitches cause I work late at night The elves want more money – The reindeer all fight Rudoph got drunk and goosed all the…
(0)
Loading...
Bubba Wilkes goes in to see Dr. Smith. “Dr. Smith…I’ve got a problem!” exclaimed Bubba. “Just what seems to be the matter, Bubba?” remarked Dr. Smith. “Well, I’ve been having hot flashes on and off for the last 3 weeks and it’s really getting to bother me. Can you check me out to find out what’s wrong?” “No problem, Bubba,” said Dr. Smith. “You know we have one of the best labs in the country next door. We’ll do the…
(0)Loading...
There was a German, a American and a Pollock on death row. The Warden gave them a choice of three ways to die: 1 was to be shot, 2 was to be hung, 3 was to be injected with the A.I.D.S. virus. So the German said, “Shoot me right in the head.” (Boom He was dead instantly). Then the American said, “Just hang me.” (Snap he was dead) Then the Pollock said, “Give me some of that AIDS stuff.” They…
(0)Loading...
Thursday’s Schedule for the new Fall Television season: NBC 8:00 Friends 8:30 Girlfriends 9:00 One Guy with Several Female Friends 9:30 My Gay Friends FOX 8:00 Real Humans in Real Pain 8:30 Feral Dingoes Eating Children on Tape 9:00 Jiggle It Beach 9:30 LA Chicks 10:00 Beverly Hills 90210: The 90,210th Episode UPN 8:00 The Unwatchables 8:30 Voyage To The Bottom Of The Ratings 9:00 Theoretically Existing Show 9:30 Praying For Syndication 10:00 The Last Thing You’d Ever Want To…
(2)Loading...
There would be a “Rehearsal Dinner Kegger” until the cops showed up. Bridesmaids would wear matching blue jean cut-offs and halter tops. They would have NO tan lines and more skin showing than not. Tuxes would have team logos on the back and the Nike shoes would have matching team colors. June weddings would be scheduled around basketball play-offs. Vows would mention cooking and sex specifically, but omit that “forsaking all others” part. The couple would leave the ceremony in…
(1)Loading...
YO MAMMA IS SO FAT ?Yo momma so fat her nickname is “DAMN!” ?Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. ?Yo momma so fat we’re in her right now ?Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise ?Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone ?Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors ?Yo mamma so fat you have to roll over twice to get off…
(0)Loading...
In the Beginning was The Plan And then came the Assumptions And the Assumptions were without form and the Plan was completely without substance and the darkness was upon the face of the workers and they spoke among themselves, saying “It is a crock of shit, and it stinketh to high heaven.” And the workers went unto their Supervisors and sayeth, “It is a pail of dung and none may abide the odor thereof.” And the Supervisors went unto their…
(0)Loading...
Seems an elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, “Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.” The gentleman replied, “Oh, I haven’t told my family yet.…
(0)Loading...
Things you shouldn’t say to a cop Sorry, Officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in. And that hooker I met at the AIDS clinic said you were a nice guy. Hey, you must’ve been doin’ about 125mph to keep up with me! Good job! That uniform makes your ass look really big. Excuse me. Is “stick up” hyphenated? I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a Police Officer. You don’t happen…
(1)Loading...
A man had gone to see the doctor several hours before and his wife was worried about him. Finally the doctor’s office called and the doctor said, “Mrs. Smith, I have some bad news. I’m afraid your husband is very sick.” The woman said, “Oh my God, what does he have, doctor?” The doctor replied, “Well, that’s just it- he either has AIDS or Alzheimer’s Disease. I need your help to figure out which one it is.” The woman, “Of…
(0)Loading...