Ace Jokes - page 79

Follow the instructions demonstrated in the dialogue shown, and YOU can get a free meal. No law-breaking is involved. This incident really happened…. Enter any eating establishment, which does NOT have a dining counter. Here’s how the conversation with the host/hostess MIGHT proceed: “I’d like to sit at the counter.” “I’m sorry, Sir, but we don’t have a counter.” “Yes you do.” “No, I’m sorry, but we do not.” “You have no counter at all, in this establishment?” “No Sir,…

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(Except the word ‘panties’ has been substituted.) A tremor in the panties. The last time I felt this was in the presence of my old master. You are unwise to lower your panties. We’ve got to be able to get some reading on those panties, up or down. She must have hidden the plans in her panties. These panties may not look like much, kid, but they’ve got it where it counts. I find your lack of panties disturbing. These…

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One day, a well-to-do lady was walking home and met an old beggar on the street. “Madame,” said the beggar, leaning over to pick up a rock from the side of the road, “I will eat this rock for your enjoyment.” Well, the lady had never seen a man eat a rock before, so she agreed. “First,” said the man, “I will need to cook it.” The lady agreed and took the man to her home, where she showed him…

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1. Connection – Heh… what connection? 2. Complicated – Once you finally connect to the Internet (see #1), the thing that they don’t tell you when you get the Internet is how impossible it is to use if you have never used it before. They all think it is sooo easy, and I probably would think it was easy too if I programmed it. If you are dedicated enough to actually try to figure it out, that is close to…

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