6 years Jokes - page 6

You might be a computer geek if…

You Might Be a Computer Geek If… You may have heard of Jeff Foxworthy’s humorous dialogue about rednecks, well, this is a twist on his style of humor. You might be a computer geek, by Jeff Foxqwerty. You might be a computer geek: 1 If you have 20/20 vision, and still can’t C… 2 If You buy a car and ask what version it is instead of model… 3 If the biggest purchase of your life happens at least once…

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Golf Fanatic

This American golf fanatic always dreamed of playing at St. Andrews, and finally got the chance. Going with his wife, they teed off andhe proceeded to play the best game of his life. After 9 holes, he was 5 strokes under par,and was on cloud nine. On the back nine, he started playing even better,even getting an Eagle on the 16th hole. He was so excited that he ended up slicing the shot on the 17th tee,and as he walked…

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13 Signs of the 90’s

13 signs that you have had too much of the 90’s: 1.) You tried to enter your password on the microwave. 2.) You now think of three expressos as “getting wasted.” 3.) You haven’t played solitaire with a real deck of cards in years. 4.) You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3. 5.) You e-mail your son in his room to tell him that dinner is ready, and he e-mails you back “What’s…

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The loan request

A New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA loan for a client. He was told the loan would be granted if he could prove satisfactory title to a parcel of property being offered as collateral. The title to the property dated back to 1803, which took the lawyer three months to track down. After sending the information to the FHA, he received the following reply (actual letter): “Upon review of your letter adjoining your client’s loan application, we note that the…

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Things You Learn as You Mature

I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in. I’ve learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes. I’ve learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it. I’ve learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you’d better have a big weenie or huge…

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Three blondes on a building

There were three blondes on a building and each one of them was going to commit suicide because they couldn’t take anymore blonde jokes. The first blonde jumps and it takes 3 months to scrape her off of the side walk. The second blonde jumps and it takes 6 months to scrape all of her off the road. Finally the 3rd blonde jumps and lands on a seatless bycicle, and it takes 5 years to get the smile off of…

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Are You Normal?

True Facts About Americans Only 30% of us can flare our nostrils. 21% of us don’t make our bed daily. 5% of us never do. Men do 29% of laundry each week. Only 7% of women trust their husbands to do it correctly. 40% of women have hurled footwear at a man. 85% of men don’t use the slit in their underwear. 67.5% of men were tightie whities (briefs). The average bra size today is 36C whereas 10 years ago…

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What Mama Knows Now

What to wear often has implications — depending on the generation involved. A 16-year-old girl buys herself a very skimpy bikini. Modeling it for her mother, she asks: “So, Mom, what do you think?” Her mother replies, “I think that if I had worn that when I was your age, you’d be five years older!”

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Final Words

The National Transportation Safety Board recently divulged they had funded a project with the US auto makers for the past five years. The NTSB covertly funded a project whereby the auto makers were installing black boxes in four wheel drive pickup trucks in an effort to determine, in fatal accidents, the circumstances in the last 15 seconds before the crash. They were surprised to find in 49 of the 50 states the last words of drivers in 61.2% of fatal…

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Bar Talk Interpretations

No, really, I’m O.K. to drive… – I’m wasted, and I am too embarrassed to have anybody see who I’m going with I’m not used to these darts… – I’m not used to throwing anything smaller than a pool cue when I’m this bombed. Let’s go out to my car and get some cigarettes…(male to female) – You would look great face down in my lap. Want to check out my new car stereo? (male to female) – I have…

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Read JokeBar Talk Interpretations