Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
There were these 3 guys on a boat. The boat hit a rock and sank. The 3 guys swam to this island. They went on their daily swim and found a magic lamp. The guy took it back to the island and rubbed the lamp. A genie came out and said to the 3 of them,”Since there are three of you I will give you each one wish.” The first guy says,”I’ve been on this island for 50 years and…
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There once was a man named Tom who was going out with a woman named Lorraine. He thought Lorraine was THE one. They had been going out for years and he was thinking of finally proposing. Tom was also the head of a company and one day his personal secretary of many years quit because of family issues. Tom was upset but contacted an agency to find his a suitable replacement. Immediatly they found one, named Clearly, and she was…
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As an ex-telemarketer, a couple of incidents happened to me… Let me share them with ya! Me: Hi, may I speak to Mr. Jones? Mr: Speaking. Me: This is Susan calling from Mutual Medical Insurance. Mr: Am I insured with you? Me: No, but we’re calling to offer you a medical plan, which will take care of almost all your medical expences. Mr: I’m sorry, I can’t hear you. Me: We’re calling to offer you a medical plan, which will…
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Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable response to “I love you.” Hallmark would make “Sorry, what was your name again?” cards. When your girlfriend really needed to talk to you during the game, she’d appear in a little box in the corner of the screen during a timeout. Breaking up would be a lot easier. A smack to the ass and a “Nice hustle, you’ll get ’em next time” would pretty much do it. The…
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Shakey went to a psychiatrist. “Doc,” he said, “I’ve got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there’s somebody under it. I get under the bed, I think there’s somebody on top of it. Top, under, top, under! You gotta help me, I’m going crazy!” “Just put yourself in my hands for two years,” said the shrink. “Come to me three times a week, and I’ll cure your fears.” “How much do you charge?” “A hundred dollars per…
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Pete and Larry had not seen each other in many years. Now they had a long talk trying to fill in the gap of those years by telling about their lives. Finally, Pete invited Larry to visit him in his new apartment. “I got a wife and three kids and I’d love to have you visit us.” “Great. Where do you live?” “Here’s the address. And there’s plenty of parking behind the apartment. Park and come around to the front…
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George W. is walking in the airport when he sees a man with a long white beard and long white hair. George W. walks up to him and asks him if he is Moses. The man doesn’t say anything and keeps on walking away. George W. is puzzled and catches up with the old man and again asks him if he is Moses. The old man looks at him, then walks away even faster. Now, George W. is really getting…
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There were some backwoods hillbillies living across the river from each other, who feuded constantly. John hated Clarence with a passion and never passed up a chance to throw rocks across the river at Clarence. This went on for years until one day the Corps of Engineers came to build a bridge across that river. John was elated; he told his wife that finally he was going to get the chance to cross over and “whip Clarence’s butt.” He left…
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A true story . . . . When Apollo Mission Astronaut, Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon, he not only gave his famous “One Small Step for Man, One Giant Leap for Mankind” statement, but followed it by several remarks, usual com traffic between him, the other astronauts and Mission Control. Just before he reentered the lander, however, he made the enigmatic remark, “Good luck, Mr. Gorsky.” Many people at NASA thought it was a casual remark concerning some…
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…CCA Prison Realty Trust? They’re buying Corrections Corp. of America in a $3.17 billion deal that will create the world’s largest penitentiary business. The merged entity will market its product under the more user-friendly name, “Motel 6-to-Life.” …Patrizia Martinelli, ex-wife of fashion heir Maurizio Gucci? She was convicted of ordering her husband’s murder and was sentenced to 29 years in prison. Most agree this is a tremendous price for a Gucci knockoff. …McDonald’s? They have a new series of TV…
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