Washington d c Jokes

George Washington

DID YOU EVER HEAR THE EXPRESSION: YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING? THIS IS HOW IT ORIGINATED: George Washington was traveling with his troops at Valley Forge. They were cold, hungry and tired. One of the soldiers asks General Washington when they can stop to get some food and rest. Washington tells them he’ll stop at the next house he sees. At the house, he knocks on the door and asks the lady if she can give his men food and…

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George Washington and the cherry tree

A farmer walked out to the edge of his feilds and summoned his two sons. When they finally arrived back at the farm house, the father told his sons that he wanted to teach them a lesson about honesty and integrity. The two boys listened with interest. “When George Washington was a young man” he said “George chopped down a cherry tree. His father asked George who had chopped down the the cherry tree, and because he was honest his…

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Bill’s Sax

Bill walks into a downtown bar in Washington and there’s a band playing. He goes up to the band at a break and asks if he can play his saxophone in the band. The band leader says no. Bil says, “Please can I play my sax?” Again the band leader says no. Bill says, “I’m the President, you have to let me play!” The band gets mad and says, “No, now get out of here.” Bill turns around and starts…

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The World is Populated by Idiots

1. Police in Wichita, Kansas, arrested a 22-year-old man at an airport hotel after he tried to pass two (counterfeit) $16 bills. 2. A man in Johannesburg, South Africa, shot his 49-year-old friend in the face, seriously wounding him, while the two practiced shooting beer cans off each other’s head. 3. A company trying to continue its five-year perfect safety record showed its workers a film aimed at encouraging the use of safety goggles on the job. According to Industrial…

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lots and lots and lots of…you get the picture.

your mom is so fat…she went to Sizzler’s and got a group discount. your mom is so fat…her belt size is equator. your mom is so fat…she was baptised in the pacific ocean. your mom is so stupid, she told me she tripped over a cordless phone. your mom is so old, she walked by an antiqe shop and they put a price tag on her. your mom is so old…she knew god. your mom is so fat, she sat…

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Read Jokelots and lots and lots of…you get the picture.

ya mom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yo mamma — THE LIST YO MAMMA IS SO FAT ?Yo momma so fat her nickname is “DAMN!” ?Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. ?Yo momma so fat we’re in her right now ?Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise ?Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone ?Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors ?Yo mamma so fat you have to roll…

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Low on Oil

There are a lot of folks that can’t understand how we are running out of oil here in the USA. Well, here is the answer: It’s simple…notbody bothered to check the oil. Didn’t know we were getting low. And, of course, the reason for that is geographical. Most of the oil is in Texas, Louisiana, and Oklahoma, and all the dipsticks are in Washington, D.C.

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Saddam, Bill, and the small red buttons.

The peace talks are in progress. Saddam invites Bill over to Bagdahd to talk. Halfway through the talks, Saddam presses a small red button on his chair. Suddenley, a boxing glove flies through the air and hits Bill right on the nose. “Ah Crap!” whines Bill “Why d’ya do that?” Saddam just laughs. After about 10 more minutes of the peace talks, Saddam pushes another small red button on his chair. From underneath the table, a big boot comes out…

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Read JokeSaddam, Bill, and the small red buttons.