Sitting on the bench Jokes - page 2

Johnny Appleseed

Little Johnny asks his teacher: “How are the babies made?” Teacher, not wanting to take the responsibility of explaining such a sensitive subject, suggests that he go home and ask his parents. When he gets home, Johnny approaches his father with the same question. His father replies, “Oh! that is a long story, you better speak to mother!” The mother, in her turn, says: “Oh! It is a difficult question, why don’t you better speak to granddad!” Grandfather is sitting…

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They have the answer

Two beggars are sitting on a park bench in Mexico City. One is holding a cross and one a Star of David. Both are holding hats to collect contributions. People walk by, lift their noses at the man with the Star of David and drop money in the hat held by the man with the cross. Soon, the hat of the man with the cross is filled and the hat of the man with the Star of David is empty.…

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Math in Everyday Life

Three men were sitting on a park bench, a biologist, a physicist, and a mathematician. They saw two people walking on the opposite side of the street and into an apartment building. Later on, the two people walked out, but with a third person with them. This puzzled the three men. “The first two must have reproduced,” explained the biologist. “That’s not right,” objected the physicist, “there was already another person in the building.” “You’re both wrong!” exclaimed the mathematician.…

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Secret to old age

Three old men were sitting on a bench in Florida when a reporter approached them. “I wonder if you three would be willing to do an interview and tell us your secret to long life,” the reported asked. The three old men agreed. The first old man was asked his secret to his long life. “I never drank alcohol, I never smoked tobacco and I have been married to the same woman for fifty years.” “Wow, thats really remarkable!” said…

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Frustrated old man!

There was an old man sitting on a park bench crying his eyes out when a young jogger came by and asked him what was the matter. The old man says, “I’m a multimillionare, I have a great big house, the fastest car in the world and I just married a beautiful blonde bombshell who satisfies me every night in bed whether I like it or not …(sob)” The young jogger says, “Man, you have everything I have ever dreamed…

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Walk in the park

A guy is walking in a park and sees this good looking blonde sitting at a park bench petting a dog. He walks up to her and says, “Does your dog bite?” She says, “No, my dog doesn’t bite.” So, he bent down to pet the dog and it lunged at him. The man said, “Hey, I thought you said your dog doesn’t bite!” The blonde replies, “This isn’t my dog.”

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Stiffy

Two men were sitting on a bench on the side of the road when two old ladies walked by. The ladies noticed that the two mens’ zippers were un-done and decided that they better inform them. The said, “Exuse me, but did you know that your zippers are un-done?” “Yes we did. Yesterday we sat here with our collars open and we got a stiff neck so we were going to see what would happen if we sat here with…

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Popping the Question(s)

Jimmie, an 80-year-old gentleman, retired to Florida after his wife of 58 years had passed away. He was quite alone in the world and longed for companionship again. One day, as he was walking through a public park, he spied what he considered to be a very pretty, silver-haired lady sitting alone on a park bench. Getting his nerve up, he approached the lady and asked graciously, “Pardon me, ma’am, but may I sit here with you?” The silver-haired Marcie…

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Elementary, My Dear Watson Part 2

“Good afternoon, ladies,” says Sherlock Holmes to three women sitting on a park bench as he and his good friend Dr. Watson are taking an afternoon stroll through the park in London. When they are out of earshot from the three women, Dr. Watson asks, “I say, Holmes, do you know those ladies back there?” “No, Watson,” replies Holmes, “I don’t know the spinster, the prostitute and the new bride.” Astonished, Watson asks again in a surprised voice, “Good heavens,…

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Read JokeElementary, My Dear Watson Part 2