Rare occasions Jokes

On one of the rare occasions that the Clintons were sleeping in the same bed, Hillary awoke at 2 a.m. and had to go to the bathroom. She shook Bill vigorously until he awoke from his deep slumber, mumbling, “What. . .what. . .what?” “I have to go to the bathroom,” Hillary says. “Well, why in the hell did you wake me up to tell me that?” “I want you to save my place!”

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President Franklin D. Roosevelt found the polite small talk of social functions at the White House somewhat tedious. He maintained that those present on such occasions rarely paid much attention to what was said to them. To illustrate the point, he would sometimes amuse himself by greeting guests with the words, “I murdered my grandmother this morning.” The response was invariably one of polite approval. On one occasion, however, the president happened upon an attentive listener. On hearing Roosevelt’s outrageous…

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