Paper towel Jokes

University Results Vary

In the rest room, an accountant, a lawyer and a cowboy were standing side by side using the urinal. The accountant finished, zipped up and started washing and literally scrubbing his hands…clear up to his elbows…he used about 20 paper towels before he finished. He turned to the other two men who were watching him and commented, “I graduated from the University of Michigan, and we were taught be clean! The lawyer finished, zipped up and quickly wet the tips…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeUniversity Results Vary

20 MORE signs of a Cheap HMO

1. Pedal-powered dialysis machines. 2. Use of antibiotics deemed an “unauthorized experimental procedure,” 3. Head-wound victim in the waiting room is on the last chapter of “War and Peace,” 4. Exam room has a tip jar. 5. You swear you saw salad tongs and a crab fork on the instrument tray just before the anesthesia kicked in. 6. “Will you be paying in eggs or pelts?” 7. Tight budget prevents acquisition of separate rectal thermometers. 8. “Take two leeches and…

(0)
Loading...

Read Joke20 MORE signs of a Cheap HMO

Bad English

English in Non-English Speaking Countries! Examples of how English is being used in different parts of the world: In a Tokyo Hotel: Is forbitten to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read notis. In another Japanese hotel room: Please to bathe inside the tub. In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable. In…

(6)Loading...

Read JokeBad English

Could Things Get Worse?

The following is taken from a Florida newspaper: A man was working on his motorcycle on his patio and his wife was in the house in the kitchen. The man was racing the engine on the motorcycle and somehow, the motorcycle slipped into gear. The man, still holding the handlebars, was dragged through a glass patio door and along with the motorcycle dumped onto the floor inside the house. The wife, hearing the crash, ran into the dining room, and…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeCould Things Get Worse?

What Men Really Mean

“I’m going fishing.” Really means… “I’m going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety.” “Let’s take your car.” Really means…. “Mine is full of beer cans, burger wrappers and completely out of gas.” “Woman driver.” Really means…. “Someone who doesn’t speed, tailgate, swear, make obscene gestures and has a better driving record than me.” “I don’t care what color you paint the kitchen.”…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeWhat Men Really Mean