Mirror Jokes

Windows and Mirrors

A rich miser was asked by a priest for a donation to the local parish and was refused. The priest sighed and said, “Come to the window, Mr. Smith. Look out and tell me what you see.” The miser looked and said, “People, what else?” “Now come to this mirror, and look in, and tell me what you see.” “Myself, what else?” “There you are. The window is glass, the mirror is glass, but the mirror has a thin layer…

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Mirror, mirror

One day a gentleman and his wife were shopping in an antiques store when she happened across an old, sadly-tarnished mirror. He was indifferent to the pending purchase, and as the woman haggled over price with the attendant, the history of the mirror was revealed. The attendant stated that this was a magic mirror and any wish which was cast upon it would come true. The only stipulation was that the wish must be asked in the form of a…

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Cinderella’s Mirror

Cinderella was excited that she had bought a new magical mirror. She hung the mirror on the door and chanted, “Mirror, mirror, on the door, make my bust a 44”. All of a sudden, Cinderella had these huge breasts and she was delighted. Sometime later, her Prince came by and noticed her new magical mirror. The Prince thought that he too would give the new magical mirror a try. The Prince then chanted, “Mirror, mirror, on the door, make my…

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Mirror,mirror on the wall who’s the dumbest one of all

There’s a bar in New York that has a truth mirror.If you say a lie it sucks you in.A red head walked in the bar and said,”I’m the cutest girl in New York”,so the mirror sucked her in.Then a brunet walked in and said,”I’m the smartest girl in New York”,so the mirror sucked her in. Then a blond waled in and said, “I’m….” and the mirror sucked her in.

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Stolen Car Returned

Finishing their shopping at the mall, a couple discovers that their brand-new car was stolen. They file a report at the police station, and a detective drives them back to the parking lot to look for evidence. To their amazement, the car has been returned and there’s a note in it that says “I apologize for taking your car. My wife was having a baby and I hot-wired your ignition to rush her to the hospital. Please forgive the inconvenience.…

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Clinton’s Complaint

One day, President Clinton calls up the White House’s interior decorator and angrily complains, “My daughter Chelsea says she has the ugliest room in the White House. I want you to do something about this right now. I don’t want the little darling to be this upset. “Yes, Mr. President, ” says the interior decorator. “I will take down all those mirrors right away.”

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Big Game Hunter

The big game hunter walked into the bar and bragged to everyone about his skills as a hunter. The man was undoubtedly a good shot and no one could dispute that. But then he said that they could blindfold him and he would recognise any animal’s skin from its feel, and if he could locate the bullet hole he would even tell them what calibre rifle was used to shoot it. This was a bit too much for the other…

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Make-Believe Ballroom

Cowboy Tex is out on the trail rounding up strays when suddenly his horse rears in terror. Tex draws his six-gun and takes aim at a rattlesnake warming itself in the morning sun. “Hold on, Tex” says the snake, “Don’t shoot. I’m really a genie, and I’ll grant you three wishes if you don’t kill me.” Since Tex and his horse are not within the rattlesnake’s striking range, he decides to take the snake’s offer. “OK,” says Tex. Here’s my…

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Morbid Curiosity

A new minister in a small town spent the first four days desperately calling on the membership, begging them to come to his first services….He failed. Early the following week, he placed a notice in the local newspaper stating that, as the church was dead, it was his duty to give it a decent Christian burial. The funeral would be held the following Sunday afternoon, the notice said. Morbidly curious, the whole town turned out. In front of the pulpit,…

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