Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
After nearly forty years in practice as a gynecologist, John decided he had enough money to retire and take up his real love, auto mechanics. He left his practice, enrolled in auto mechanics school, and studied hard. The day of the final exam came and John worried if he would be able to complete the test with the same proficiency as his younger classmates. Most of the students completed their exam in two hours. John, on the other hand, took…
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What is the difference between a mechanical and a civil engineer? A mechanical engineer builds weapons. A civil engineer builds targets.
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An Amish lady is trotting down the road in her horse and buggy when she is pulled over by a cop. “Ma’am, I’m not going to ticket you, but I do have to issue you a warning. You have a broken reflector on your buggy.” “Oh, I’ll let my husband, Jacob, know as soon as I get home.” “That’s fine. Another thing, ma’am. I don’t like the way that one rein loops across the horse’s back and around one of…
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A traveling salesman checked into a futuristic motel. Realizing he needed a haircut before his next day’s meeting, he called down to the desk clerk and asked if there was a barber on the premises. “I’m afraid not, Sir,” the clerk told him, apologetically, “but down the hall is a special machine that should serve your purposes.” Skeptical, but intrigued, the salesman located the appropriate machine, inserted 50 cents, stuck his head in the opening, at which time the machine…
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Jaws at 50: Spielberg Admits He Feared Career Doom and Witnessed Epic Barfing. The legendary filmmaker, celebrating a new exhibition in LA, looked back at the chaotic making of his iconic shark flick. Apparently, it wasn’t all smooth sailing… or rather, smooth swimming! ? He confessed to fearing his career was ‘over’ during the notoriously difficult production, which famously involved a perpetually malfunctioning mechanical shark. But wait, there’s more! He also vividly recalled the sheer amount of seasickness on set,…
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A couple of drinking buddies who are airplane mechanics are in a hanger in New York Airport; it’s fogged in and they have nothing to do. One of them says to the other “Man, have you got anything to drink?” “Nah, but I hear you can drink jet fuel, that’ll kinda give you a buzz.” So they do, get smashed and have a beautiful time. The following morning, one of them wakes up and he knows his head will explode…
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A young woman was bored with driving her BMW. It lacked individuality and besides that, every other girl in the office had one. She fancied something a bit more individual, perhaps an MG convertible. That week she visited her local car dealer and spied a beautiful Jaguar XK140 convertible. It was wonderfully restored and she fell in love with its gorgeous red paint work. An empty check stub later, she was tearing down the leafy country lanes enjoying her beautiful…
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Inventions by Blondes ? The water-proof towel ? Glow in the dark sunglasses ? Solar powered flashlights ? Submarine screen doors ? A book on how to read ? Inflatable dart boards ? A dictionary index ? Mechanical Pencil sharpeners ? Powdered water ? Pedal-powered wheel chairs ? Waterproof tea bags ? Watermelon seed sorter ? Zero proof alcohol ? Reuseable ice cubes ? See-through toilet tissue ? Skinless bananas ? Do-it-yourself road map ? Turnip ice cream ? Toe…
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1. The AOL car would have a TOP speed of 40 MPH yet have a 200 MPH speedometer. 2. The AOL car would come equipped with a NEW and fantastic 8-Track tape player. 3. The car would often refuse to start and owners would just expect this and try again later. 4. The windshield would have an extra dark tint to protect the driver from seeing better cars. 5. AOL would sell the same model car year after year and…
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A penguin is driving in the middle of a desert and his car breaks down. Luckily he sees a gas station a little further down the road, so he coasts on in and tells the mechanic something is wrong with his car. Then he goes inside the gas station while the mechanic determines what’s wrong and buys an ice cream. The penguin walks out of the gas station and the mechanic says, “It looks like you blew a seal!” and…
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