Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
There once was a blonde that went into a library and ask one of the librarians, “Can I have a large fri and a large coke.” The librarian said, “Quiet! This is a library not McDonalds.” The blonde said, “Oh I’m sorry” and she said very quietly, “Can I have a large fri and a large coke.”
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ACCOUNTANTS are good with figures. ACTORS do it on cue. ADVERTISERS use the “new, improved” method. AMBULANCE DRIVERS come quicker. ARCHAEOLOGISTS like it old. ARCHITECTS have great plans. ARTISTS are exhibitionists. ASSEMBLY LINE WORKERS do it over and over. ASTRONOMERS do it with Uranus. ATTORNEYS make better motions. AUDITORS like to examine figures. BABYSITTERS charge by the hour. BAILIFFS always come to order. BAKERS knead it daily. BAND MEMBERS play all night. BANKERS do it with interest – penalty for…
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Four surgeons were sitting around a table, talking about which type of people they like to operate on. “I like to operate on librarians,” says the first one. “When you open them up, everything is in alphabetical order.” “I like to operate on accountants,” said the second one. “When you open them up, they are in numerical order.” “I like to operate on engineers.” said the third one. “They will understand if you end up with some extra parts.” The…
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Three surgeons were at lunch one day having a conversation about what they liked the most about operating. The first surgeon said: “I like operating on accountants because their insides are numbered.” The second surgeon said: “I enjoy operating on librarians because their insides are in alphabetical order.” The third doctor said: “I really love to operate lawyers becasue they are spineless, heartless, gutless, and best of all, their heads and asses are interchangeable.”
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Judi stormed up to the front desk of the library and said, “I have a complaint!” “Yes, Ma’am?” “I borrowed a book last week, and it was horrible!” “What was wrong with it?” “It had way too many characters, and there was no plot whatsoever!” The librarian nodded and said, “Ahhh. So YOU must be the person who took our phone book!”
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Four doctors who hadn?t seen each other since their surgical residencies met at a medical seminar. Adjourning for dinner and drinks, they turned their conversation to who makes the best surgical patients: The first said, for sure, electrical engineers. ?You open ?em up,? he contended, ?and everything is color-coded.? ?Nah,? said the second. ?It?s librarians. You open ?em up and everything is alphabetized.? The third scoffed. ?Of course not,? he said. ?It?s accountants. You open ?em up and everything is…
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A little boy walked up to the librarian to check out a book entitled, COMPREHENSIVE GUIDE FOR MOTHERS. When the librarian asked him if it was for his mother, he answered no. “Then why are you checking it out?” “Because,” said the boy, beaming from ear to ear, . . . “I just started collecting moths last month!”
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