Ground coffee Jokes

Biggest Stud on the Plane

There were these three guys on a plane going from Florida to New York. The first, wearing a suit and tie, and reading the NEW YORK TIMES, commented, “Last night I made love to my wife three times. This morning she made me fresh ground coffee, brought the paper to me in bed, and she said I was the best lover in the world.” “That ain’t nothing!” said the guy reading USA TODAY, dressed in chinos and a casual shirt.…

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Bigger Breasts at Any Cost

Once there was this woman who was, sad to say, very flat chested. Year after year of seeing beautiful, large-breasted women walking away with handsome guys finally got the best of her. She decided that she would have large tits at any cost. At first she went to a breast treatment center and asked for larger breasts. After several weeks, despite all the injections and fillers they had given her, her breasts were no larger. She despaired. She went everywhere,…

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Decaf destroys brain cells…

Here’s the background: Ian works in a coffee, bagels, and sandwiches trailer on the campus of UNH. (The University of New Hampshire, for those not from the East Coast of the U.S.) Vinnie is his boss and the owner of the truck, and yes, according to Ian, this actually happened. Ian is telling the story. Her: Yes, I’d like a milk with some coffee in it. Me: So, that’s just a splash of coffee in a milk? Her: No, a…

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Waiter…. Oh Waiter!

Customer: Waiter! There is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Don’t worry sir, the spider in the bread will get it. Customer: Waiter! There is a spider in my soup! Waiter: Don’t worry! The frog should surface any moment now. Customer:Waiter, There’s another fly in my soup. Waiter: Now, there is a fly that knows some good soup. But if you insist I will get you the fly swatter. Customer: What is the fly doing in my soup? Waiter: It…

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David

David goes to a department store and sees a Thermos flask, he asks an assitant how it works. “It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold.” So he buys one. Later on he goes to the training ground, and Mr. Ferguson asks him how his Thermos flask works, “It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold.” “What have you got in it David??” “Two cups of coffee and a chocolate ice cream.”

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100 Blonde Jokes!

1. Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A: Gifted! 2. Q: How do blonde braincells die? A: Alone. 3. Q: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? A: Pregnant. 4. Q: How do you brainwash a blonde? A: Give her a douche and shake her upside down. 5. Q: What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette? A: Artificial intelligence. 6. Q: How does a blonde part their…

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