Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
” Yeah, whatever..” ” It’s your stomach..” ” Would you like that cooked?”.. ” How much salt is TOO much?..” ” If your order is hot, then consider it a gift..” ” You don’t actually think I’m listening, do you?”.. ” Don’t mind the open sore on my lip when you get to the window”.. ” I’m just getting over Hepatitus”.. ” I have to pee, can you hold on a minute?..
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ACCOUNTANTS are good with figures. ACTORS do it on cue. ADVERTISERS use the “new, improved” method. AMBULANCE DRIVERS come quicker. ARCHAEOLOGISTS like it old. ARCHITECTS have great plans. ARTISTS are exhibitionists. ASSEMBLY LINE WORKERS do it over and over. ASTRONOMERS do it with Uranus. ATTORNEYS make better motions. AUDITORS like to examine figures. BABYSITTERS charge by the hour. BAILIFFS always come to order. BAKERS knead it daily. BAND MEMBERS play all night. BANKERS do it with interest – penalty for…
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10. Your car can actually go airborn when driving over hills at high speeds. 9. Never flip off the elderly, they may have heart conditions. 8. If you see a pedestrian crossing the road, do not speed up and take bets on whether they will make it or if they will have to run back. 7. If you have little kids in the car and you see a rabbit hopping across the road, do not speed up and say “wow…
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KEEP HONKING WHILE I RE-LOAD TAXATION WITH REPRESENTATION ISN’T MUCH BETTER MY WIFE SAYS I DON’T LISTEN TO HER. I THINK THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID. YOUR KID MAY BE AN HONOR STUDENT BUT YOU’RE STILL AN IDIOT IF YOU CAN READ THIS, I CAN HIT MY BRAKES AND SUE YOU. IS A GRUNTLED EMPLOYEE THE OPPOSITE OF A DISGRUNTLED EMPLOYEE? WHEN SIGN-PAINTERS GO ON STRIKE, WHO PAINTS THEIR PICKET SIGNS? WHAT ARE PREPARATIONS A THRU G? WHY ARE THERE BRAILLE…
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“I’m going fishing.” Really means… “I’m going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety.” “Let’s take your car.” Really means…. “Mine is full of beer cans, burger wrappers and completely out of gas.” “Woman driver.” Really means…. “Someone who doesn’t speed, tailgate, swear, make obscene gestures and has a better driving record than me.” “I don’t care what color you paint the kitchen.”…
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I pulled up to the drive-thru of a fast-food restaurant and ordered coffee. I asked the clerk to put some ice cubes into the cup so that I could drink the cooled coffee quickly. At the window, there was a delay. Finally, a teenage girl came to the window looking frustrated. “I’m having a problem,” she announced. “The ice keeps melting.”
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1. Order 25 tacos at the drive-thru, then just pull off. 2. Demand to speak with that talking Chihuahua. 3. Ask for ketchup with your nachos. 4. Ask if they accept Mexican money. 5. Tell them you want a taco, but tell them without the shell. 6. Scream “VIVA GORDITAS!” the whole time you are in there. 7. Order nachos; without cheese. 8. Ask if you can super size your taco. 9. Claim that you are the voice-over guy for…
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