Dollar bill Jokes - page 3

Gals’ Night Out

Last Saturday night to celebrate my birthday, my sister-in-law phoned a few of my friends and took me to a male strip club. I have to admit, some of these guys are quite attractive. To get the evening moving, my sister-in-law Angela started waving a ten-dollar bill, and a male dancer came right up to us. She licked the bill and stuck it on his butt, and this guy started gyrating right in her face. My friend Jane was getting…

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Yo Mama

1. Yo Mama is soo fat, she stepped on a dollar bill and made change. 2. Yo Mama is soo stupid, she thought she needed an x-ray when she broke wind. 3. Yo Mama is soo ugly, when she was born the doctor smacked her with a lawsuit. 4. Yo Mama is soo fat, if she fell she would rock herself to sleep trying to get up.

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A Programmer & A Engineer

A Programmer and an Engineer A Programmer and an Engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Programmer leans over to the Engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Programmer persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lotta fun.…

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Show Me The Money And I’ll Show You …

In a train compartment, there are 3 men and a ravishing young girl. The four passengers join in conversation, which very soon turns to the erotic. Then, the young girl proposes, “If each of you will give me $1.00, I will show you my legs.” The men, charmed by this young girl, all pull a buck out of their wallet. And then the girl pulls up her dress a bit to show her legs. Then she says, “If each of…

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A Happy Nation

Gore and the First family were on board Air Force One, when Clinton turned to Gore and says;”You know if I throw a hundred dollar bill out the window I could make one person very happy!” Gore just shrugs his stiff shoulders and says, “Well I could throw 10 ten dollars bills out the window and make 10 people very happy! Not to be left out Hilary tosses her hair-sprayed stiff hair and says; “I could throw 100 one dollar…

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The Bus, The Doctor, The Onlooker And The People In The Bus.

In a very crowded bus, one busy Monday morning, a passenger unable to resist an urge releases it silently, but the smell gets so bad that the people in the bus had to get out. The passengers, who were very annoyed asked the driver to send off the person responsible for the stinking act, but they were unable to point out who it was since everybody was accusing somebody. The accusations became very unorganised and the commotion attracted a big…

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The Nest Egg

Jones was having difficulties in business. “If I had as little as a thousand dollars in actual cash right now, this minute,” he said to his wife sadly, “it might make all the difference.” “If that is all,” said Mrs. Jones, “then all is well.” She ran upstairs and came down with a large jar filled with bills. “I’ve kept this as a secret nest egg. You see, ever since we got married, I put a ten-dollar bill into the…

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10 ways to know if your kid is too old for your milk

These are 10 different ways of knowing that your kid is too old for breast freeding. 10. He can open the blouse himself. 9. While sucking one breast he caresses the other one. 8. He has developed a bad habit of flicking his tongue. 7. He keeps slipping dollar bills in your belt. 6. He uses the milk as a creamer for his coffee. 5. Your birth control pills interfere with his acne medicine. 4. After each feeding he has…

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How to respond to e-mail ads….

You know those “special offers” that “you would be CRAZY to turn down”? Here’s how you might wish to respond to them: —————————————- To Whom It May Concern: Thank you for your recent e-mail to me. It was good hearing from you and reading your advertisement As information, I am a reasonably healthy male, over 40 years of age. If you sent me the ad/offer regarding how I may “enlarge my breasts,” I think I’ll pass, if you don’t mind.…

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WINE – OOOOHHHHH

A homeless drunk scrapes up all his change one day and heads for his favorite liquor store. He places $5.00 in change on the counter and says, “Max give me four bottles of the cheapest ripple ya got!” Eager with his score, he immediately downs all four bottles and passes out in an alley. Along about 1:30am a disgruntled fag happens by after striking out at the local gay bar. Spying the passed out drunk, he decides to relive himself.…

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