Blouse Jokes

If Men Were to Rewrite

Rule #1: Anything we said six or eight months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after seven days. Rule #2: If you don’t want to dress like Victoria’s Secret Girls, don’t expect us to act like soap opera guys. Rule #3: If we say something that can be interpreted in two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other way. Rule #4: It is neither in your…

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Read JokeIf Men Were to Rewrite

Indecent Exposure

The blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open and her right breast hanging out. A policeman approaches her and says, “Ma’am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?” Innocently, she says, “Why, Officer?” “Because your breast is exposed.” “OH, MY GOD!” says the blonde. “I forgot my baby on the BUS!!!”

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Read JokeIndecent Exposure

In the zoo

A couple goes into the zoo. They stop at the gorilla cage. He says to her: “Well, let’s make a test. Take off your blouse.” She’s slightly confused, but she does so. The gorilla starts getting nervous. “Now, take off your skirt,” he says. And she takes off her skirt. The gorilla is now running up and down. “And finally,” he says, “take off your bra and slip.” And she does so. The gorilla is getting completely nuts. “And now,”…

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Read JokeIn the zoo

Colours

Classroom scene: The teacher walks into her fifth grade class and says: “OK children, today we will not use the textbook.” All the children were happy, especially those who didn’t get their homework done. Teacher goes on to say, “Today we will be talking about colours, and we will use our imagination to talk about colours. Can anyone tell me a story about colours?” An Irish boy raises his hand and starts “My daddy is a policeman and he wears…

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Read JokeColours

Signs it’s Time to Stop Breastfeeding!

10. Child can now open your blouse by himself. 9. The kid starts burping up silicone. 8. Child has developed a bad habit of flicking his tongue. 7. The little one keeps slipping dollar bills in your belt. 6. Child demands that you express for his cafe latte. 5. Your birth control pills interfere with his acne medicine. 4. After each session, you both have a smoke. 3. Child invites his friends over for dinner. 2. You feel an uncontrollable…

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Read JokeSigns it’s Time to Stop Breastfeeding!

The Butler Did It

So there is this rich woman who lives in a large mansion. One day she comes upon the butler and says, “Butler, take off my blouse.” With trembling hands, he takes off her blouse. Next she says, “Butler, take off my skirt.” Shaking violently now, he takes off her skirt. Then she says, “Take off my bra.” He eases off her bra, still trembling. Then she says, “Butler, take off my panties.” Then the rich woman says “And if I…

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Little Johnny’s Gender Lesson

One day, Little Johnny was home from school earlier than usual. Without a word, he handed his mother a note from the school principal. In the note, the principal wrote, “We are sending Johnny home early to prevent disrupting the class. Please educate him on the difference between male and female.” After reading the note, Little Johnny’s mother took him silently to her bedroom upstairs. When they were in the bedroom, Little Johnny’s mother said to him, “Little Johnny, take…

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Read JokeLittle Johnny’s Gender Lesson

What’s THAT Supposed to Mean???

When WOMEN say…… Yes = No No = Yes I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry. We need… = I want… It’s your decision = The decision I want you to make should be obvious to you by now. Do whatever you want = You’ll pay for it later. We need to talk = I need to complain. Sure, go ahead = You better not if you know what’s good for you. I’m NOT upset = Of course I’m upset, you…

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Read JokeWhat’s THAT Supposed to Mean???

A Visit to the Pediatrician’s Office

A beautiful, buxomy woman carrying a baby paid a visit to the pediatrician. She complained, “Doctor, there must be something wrong with the baby. Instead of gaining weight, he had already lost three ounces since last week.” The pediatrician placed the baby on the examining table and proceeded to examine him. Then he reached over and squeezed the woman’s breasts. After that, he unbuttoned her blouse, unstrapped her bra and proceeded to suck her nipple powerfully. “No wonder,” declared the…

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Read JokeA Visit to the Pediatrician’s Office

Here’s looking at you

An extremely well endowed receptionist was primly seated at the front desk of a leading provider of Internet services and help. As was the policy of the Company – there were no dress codes allowed. Knowing that she might be able to attract a future husband in this well situated position and knowing that she would not be chastised for her appearance, she elected to wear a rather low cut blouse when she was at work. One day a very…

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Read JokeHere’s looking at you