Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A mother took her three-year-old daughter to church for the first time. The church lights were lowered, and then the choir came walking down the aisle, carrying lighted candles. All was quiet until the little one started to sing in a loud voice, “Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you….”
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1. You know all the answers but nobody asks you any questions. 2. You get winded playing checkers. 3. You need a fire permit to light all of the birthday candles and you need oxygen after blowing them out. 4. You order Geritol on the rocks. 5. You sink your teeth into a thick steak and they stay there. 6. You stop to think and sometimes forget to start again. 7. You don’t need an alarm clock to get up…
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yo momma so damn dumb she lit a match to see if she blew out all the candles on her birthday cake. yo momma so damn dumb she tried to change the channel on a T.V. dinner. yo momma so damn dumb she thought the Last Supper was when Jesus ran out of food stamps.
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A joy of which I’ll not partake Is eating children’s birthday cake. To “blow out” candles, in a word, Is really patently absurd: Each puff contains sufficient moisture To propagate your av’rage oyster. So, Birthday-Boy and ditto-Daughter, Withhold from me your whiff of water. I do not need some little squirt To atomize on my dessert. Among the things I will not do Is have my cake and drink it, too.
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You receive a $300 bill from your tree surgeon and you live in an apartment. The plumber tells you it would be cheaper to install a diving board than to drain the cellar. You bear a striking resemblance to this week’s prime suspect on America’s Most Wanted. The Dialing for Dollars host quizzes you about the only John Wayne film you haven’t seen. Your heart medication has been replaced with sugar pills and a note that says “April fools!” You…
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