Bicycle 1 Jokes

Little Johnny’s Letter to Santa

Dear Santa: You must be surprised that I’m writing you today, the 26th of December. Well, I would very much like to clear up certain things that have happened since the beginning of the month! (While full of hope, I wrote you a letter.) I asked for a bicycle, an electric train set, a pair of roller blades, and a football uniform. I absolutely wrecked my brain studying all year! Not only was I first in my class, but I…

(17)Loading...

Read JokeLittle Johnny’s Letter to Santa

Little Johnny’s Mom

Little Johnny was walking past his mother’s bedroom one day. He looked in. She was rubbing her chest, and saying, “I need a man, I need a man.” The next day, Johnny walked by his mother’s room again, and again, she was rubbing her chest and saying, “I need a man, I need a man.” The day after that, Johnny walked by his mother’s room, and she was in there with a man! Excitedly, Johnny ran to his room, started…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeLittle Johnny’s Mom

Don’t Stop that Thief!

A lady was exercising her dog in the park. A scumbag on a bicycle came up behind her and grabbed the carrier bag from her hand. Pedaling furiously into the distance with his prize, he was not aware of the lady rolling on the grass in fits of laughter. Like the good citizen that she was, she had been using the plastic bag to collect her dog’s poop.

(1)Loading...

Read JokeDon’t Stop that Thief!

How Sex is Like Riding a Bicycle

1. You have to keep pumping if you want to get anywhere. 2. It’s best to wear protective head-gear when going into unfamiliar territory. 3. You can do it with no hands, but it’s best not to try it until you have a lot of experience. 4. It’s easier to learn with the help of someone who has a lot of experience. 5. You can do it by yourself, but it’s usually not as much fun. 6. It’s usually hard…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeHow Sex is Like Riding a Bicycle

Yo mamma — THE LIST

YO MAMMA IS SO FAT ?Yo momma so fat her nickname is “DAMN!” ?Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. ?Yo momma so fat we’re in her right now ?Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise ?Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone ?Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors ?Yo mamma so fat you have to roll over twice to get off…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeYo mamma — THE LIST

The Bike Ride

A joke told about my father, Officer Harold Padgett, who was a traffic cop at the time…… George had just gotten a brand new ten speed bike when he got the notion in his head that he was going to ride his new bike across the state. George hopped on his bike and peddled away toward this new adventure. Twenty miles down the road, George is huffing and puffing all the peddling, so he pulls into a gas to take…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeThe Bike Ride

Irish Quiz Answers

Some classic answers from Irish radio Just-a-minute quiz. Actual answers given to the bould Larry Gogan (Irish Radio Presenter). 1) Something a blind man might use? A Sword 2) A Song with the word Moon in the title? Blue Suede Moon 3) Name the Capital of France? F 4) Name a bird with a long neck? Naomi Campbell 5) Name an occupation where you might need a torch? A burglar 6) Where is the Taj Mahal? Opposite the Dental Hospital…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeIrish Quiz Answers

68 FUN THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations. 2. Ride those electronic cars at the front of the store. 3. Set all the alarm clock to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day. 4. Start playing football; see how many people you can get to join in. 5. Run up to an employee (preferably a male) while squeezing your legs together and practically yell at him, “I need some…

(2)Loading...

Read Joke68 FUN THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART

Lawyer Jokes

What does a sperm have in common with a lawyer? They both have a 1 in a million chance of becoming a human! Why should lawyers be buried 100 feet deep? Because deep down, they`re really good people. Why don`t lawyers go to the beach? Cats keep trying to bury them in the sand. If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why shouldn`t you swerve and hit him? It might be your bicycle. Why did the lawyer cross the…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeLawyer Jokes

Marriage

1. I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was Always. 2. It’s not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer. 3. Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. 4. A man was complaining to a friend: “I had it all – money, a beautiful house, a big car, the love of a beautiful woman; Then, Pow! it was all gone!” “What happened?” asked the…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeMarriage