Back door Jokes - page 2

Marital Bliss

How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it. Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can’t even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you. Why do women have smaller feet than men? It’s one of those “evolutionary things” that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink. How do you know…

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Read JokeMarital Bliss

Just a joke

Two altar boys walked out of the back door of a church, stripped down naked, and jumped in, head first, to a pile of snow, and slid down the hill to the parking lot. A man who just parked his car in the parking lot demanded to know what was going on. One boy said, “It’s OK. Father Flanagan likes to have a couple cold ones after mass”.

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Read JokeJust a joke

Closing Time

A bartender is closing for the night when there’s a knock at the back door. When he answers, a dirty-looking homeless guy asks him for a toothpick. The bartender is a little surprised, but he gives him a toothpick and the guy walks away. A few minutes later, there’a a second knock at the door. When he answers, there’s another homeless guy outside who asks for a toothpick. The second man gets his toothpick, and off he goes. A few…

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Read JokeClosing Time

You’ve been WAITING for THIS one!

A Jehova’s Witness knocked on the front door of a home, and heard a faint, high pitched, “Come In”. He tried the door and it was locked, so he went around to the back door. He knocked again and heard again the high pitched “Come In”. As he entered the kitchen a large, mean, snarling Doberman met him. As he plastered himself against the wall he called out for help. Again, he heard the “Come In”. He slid down the…

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1957 Date

It’s the Spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date. He’s a pretty hip guy with his own car. When he goes to the front door, the girl’s father answers and invites him in. “Carrie’s not ready yet, so why don’t you have a seat?” he says. “That’s cool,” says Bobby. Carrie’s father asks Bobby what they’re planning to do. Bobby replies politely that they will probably just go to the soda shop or a movie. Carrie’s…

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50th Wedding Anniversary

A couple goes back to their original honeymoon hotel for a celebration of their 50th wedding anniversary. After all the family festivities they retire to the original room they stayed in on their honeymoon night 50 years prior. The woman is done with her bathroom antics and her husband takes her place for his turn to get ready. The elderly man takes quite awhile in the bathroom, as is his norm, and his wife spends the time figuring out the…

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Read Joke50th Wedding Anniversary

The 12 days of christmas

Miss Agnes McHolstein 69 Cash Ave. Beaver Valley, CO Dec. 14, 1986 My Darling, I went to the door today and the postman delivered a “partridge in a pear tree”. What a thoroughly delightful gift. I couldn’t have been more surprised. You’re an angel. With all my love and devotion, Agnes Miss Agnes McHolstein Dec. 15, 1986 Darling, Today, the postman brought your very sweet gift. Just imagine “Two turtle doves”. I’m delighted at your very thoughtful gift. They are…

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Read JokeThe 12 days of christmas

Daddy’s too fat

One night Little Jimmy couldn’t sleep, so he goes and walks to his parents room. The door was opened up a crack. Little Jimmy looks in and sees his mother on top of the father bouncing up and down. So Little Jimmy, thinking they were busy, he went back to his bed and went to sleep. The next morning, Little Jimmy asks his mother why she was bouncing up and down on Daddy. Suprised of what her son had said,…

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Read JokeDaddy’s too fat

Who’s Zooming Who?

While playing poker with his buddies at the home of his friend Eddie one Sunday evening, Dan happened to drop a dollar bill to the floor. As he bent down to pick up the dollar bill under the poker table, he happened to look directly at the shapely legs of Eddie’s wife, Mona, who was seated on a chair near the poker table. Sensing that Dan was staring at her legs, Mona slyly parted her legs revealing that she was…

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Elephant Q&A

Do you know how to pass an elephant under the door? Put him in an envelope… What if it doesn’t fit? Take off the seal… How do you hide an elephant in an strawberry field? Paint his nails red… How do you make an elephant not pass by the door? Make a knot in his tail… How do you know that there is an elephant in the pool? There is a round pair of shoes beside the pool… How does…

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Read JokeElephant Q&A