Attractive woman Jokes

Alligator in the bar

A guy walks into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He puts the toothy reptile on the bar and turns to the astonished patrons. “I’ll make you all a deal. I’ll open this alligator’s mouth and place my genitals inside. Then the ‘gator will close his mouth for one minute. He’ll then open his mouth and I’ll remove my dick, unscathed. In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of you will buy me a drink.” The crowd…

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Read JokeAlligator in the bar

Are you nuts?

There were two guys, Tom and John, sitting in a bar. Tom was inexperienced with women, while his friend John was a womanizer. They were just sitting there having their drinks when Tom noticed that there was a very attractive woman staring at him from across the bar. So he said, “John that pretty woman over there is staring at me what should I do?” John said, “Wink at her.” So Tom winks at her. After that the woman waves…

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Read JokeAre you nuts?

Do you want to dance?

A man walks up to an attractive woman at a bar. “Do you want to dance?” asks the man. “I don’t care much for this song, and wouldn’t be caught dead dancing with you anyway” snips the woman. “Oh, excuse me, you must have misunderstood — I said you look FAT in those pants!!”

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Get the Manager

A very attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub and gestures alluringly to the bartender, who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his full beard. Are you the manager?” she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands. Actually, no,” the man replies. “Can you get him for me?” she asks. I need to…

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Read JokeGet the Manager

We’re out!

A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the barman, who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard which is full and bushy. “Are you the landlord?” she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands. “Actually, no” he replies. “Can you get him for me? I need…

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Lee and The Lady

Lee Trevino just finished golfing and went to the 19th hole for a drink. He sits down at the bar next to a rather attractive woman. After a few sips, he looks to the lady and noticing how lovely she is, starts talking to her. Soon, they end up in his hotel room, and are having a rather nice time in bed. After they finish, Lee gets out of bed and walks over to the phone and picks it up.…

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A Very Weird Scene On The Bus

An attractive young woman gets on the city bus and facing the bus driver, she proceeds to put her right thumb to her nose and wiggles the other fingers on her right hand. The bus driver responds by putting his right thumb to his nose, putting his left thumb to the palm of his right hand and wiggling the eight fingers on his hands. Then the woman grabs both her breasts to which the bus driver responds by grabbing his…

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Read JokeA Very Weird Scene On The Bus

Bingo!

There is this young attractive married woman who wants expensive jewelry, designer clothes and fast cars but her husband is not so well off. One day, she comes home late wearing a gold necklace. Her husband, who has been waiting for her, asks, “Where did you get that necklace.” The woman says, “I won it at the bingo.” Three days later, the woman again comes home late wearing a mink coat. Her husband asks, “Where did you get that mink…

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The 25 Things I’ve Learned In Life…

1. The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number of helicopters in it. 2. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight-savings time. 3. People who feel the need to tell you that they have an excellent sense of humor are telling you that they have no sense of humor. 4. The most valuable function performed by the federal government is entertainment. 5. You should never say…

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Read JokeThe 25 Things I’ve Learned In Life…

Guyness Quiz

Guyness Quiz Take This Scientific Quiz to Determine Your Guyness Quotient 1. Alien beings from a highly advanced society visit the Earth, and you are the first human they encounter. As a token of intergalactic friendship, they present you with a small but incredibly sophisticated device that is capable of curing all disease, providing an infinite supply of clean energy, wiping out hunger and poverty, and permanently eliminating oppression and violence all over the entire Earth. You decide to: a.…

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