Age test Jokes

Social Security age test

An old man goes into the Social Security Office and fills out an application. Too old to have a birth certificate, he is asked to prove he is old enough. He opens his shirt and shows them the grey hair on his chest and they accept that as proof. He goes home to his wife, shows her the check, and explains to her what has happened. She replies, “Well get back down there, pull down your pants, and see if…

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France’s New PM Sworn In, Immediately Greeted by Protesters Vowing to ‘Die Standing’ for Budget Cuts

Well, that didn’t take long! ? France’s brand-new Prime Minister barely had time to find the coffee machine before being welcomed by the infamous ‘Block Everything’ protests. One Parisian teacher quipped, “Bayrou was ousted, now his policies must be eliminated!” – demanding more funds for schools and hospitals, naturally. But it was unionist Amar Lagha who stole the show, dramatically declaring to Reuters: “This day is a message… that there is no resignation, the fight continues, and a message to…

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Read JokeFrance’s New PM Sworn In, Immediately Greeted by Protesters Vowing to ‘Die Standing’ for Budget Cuts

Wagering Boys

Sister Mary burst into the office of the principal of Our Lady of Perpetual Motion School in an advanced state of agitation. “Father!” she cried, “just WAIT until you hear this!” The priest led the sister to a chair, and said, “Now just calm down and tell me what has you so excited.” “Well, Father,” the nun began, “I was just walking down the hall to the chapel, and I heard some of the older boys wagering money!” “A serious…

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Happy Marriage

A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. Their domestic tranquility had long been the talk of the town. A local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret of their long and happy marriage. “Well, it dates back to our honeymoon,” explained the lady. “We visited the Grand Canyon and took a trip down to the bottom of the canyon by pack mule. We hadn’t gone too far when my husband’s mule stumbled. My husband quietly said, ‘That’s once.’…

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Job Placement Test

A new assessment exercise… Does your organization struggle with the problem of properly fitting people to jobs? Here is a handy hint for ensuring success in job placement. Take the prospective employees you are trying to place and put them in a room with only a table and two chairs. Leave them alone for two hours, without any instruction. At the end of that time, go back and see what they are doing. If they have taken the table apart…

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A Local Radio Station Contest

A local radio station, WINO, is running a competition to find contestants who can come up with words that are not found in any English Dictionary yet can still use these words in a sentence that will make logical sense; the prize being a trip for two to Bali for a week. The DJ, Sam, has many callers, the following two standing out: DJ : WINO, what’s your name? Caller: Hi, my name’s Dave. DJ: Dave, what is your word?…

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White house protest

One day, while President Clinton was at “work” in the oval office, a secret service agent comes in and says, “Mister Clinton , I’ve got bad news, good news, and worse news. The bad news is there is a protest outside for your resignation as president, the good news is there’s only one protester.” Clinton replies, “So what’s the really bad news?” The agent says, “It’s Gore sir.”

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Our Funny English Language

Here are some examples of WHY English is the most difficult language to learn: We polish the Polish furniture. He could lead if he would get the lead out. A farm can produce produce. The dump was so full it had to refuse refuse. The soldier decided to desert in the desert. The present is a good time to present the present. At the Army base, a bass was painted on the head of a bass drum. The dove dove…

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Preps for the test

Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there is no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for the week preceding the exam and doing the following exercises you will be totally prepared for the test. And, best of all, you can do these simple practice exercises right in your own home. EXERCISE #1: Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of…

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‘I Love You’ in 22 languages

1. English……….. I Love You 2. Spanish………. Te Amo 3. French……….. Je T’aime 4. German………. Ich Liebe Dich 5. Japanese……. Ai Shite Imasu 6. Italian………. Ti Amo 7. Chinese……… Wo Ai Ni 8. Swedish…….. Jag Alskar Dig 9. Eskimo………. Nagligivaget 10. Greek………… S’Agapo 11. Hawaiian……. Aloha Nui Loa 12. Irish…………. Thaim In Grabh Leat 13. Hebrew……… Ani Ohev Otakh 14. Russian…….. Ya Lyublyu Tyebya 15. Albanian……. Une Te Dua 16. Finnish……… Mina Rakkastan Sinua 17. Turkish…….. Seni Seviyorum 18. Hungarian………

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