Jokes News

Help,Help!! said the blonde “my house is on fire!!”. the man down the street said call the cops. she was dialing she pushed the nine and said “where’s the eleven?”

This post was submitted by jake.

whats a womans arse hole and a 9v battery got in common? you know its wrong but you still lick it with your tounge!

This post was submitted by chrisy boy reed.

one day a lady went up to her boss and wanted to report him for sexual harrasment.

“so who is harrasing you?”
“well everytime i go to the coffee machine derik tells me how nice ma hair smells”
“well how is that sexual harrasment?” the boss asks
“wel

This post was submitted by maggie.

Sister Mary burst into the office of the principal of Our Lady of Perpetual Motion School in an advanced state of agitation. "Father!" she cried, "just WAIT until you hear this!" The priest led the sister to a chair, and said, "Now just calm down and tell me what has you so excited." "Well, Father," the nun began, "I was just walking down the hall to the chapel, and I heard some of the older boys wagering money!" "A serious infraction, indeed!" said the priest. "But that's not what has me so excited, Father," replied the nun. "It was WHAT they were wagering ON! They had wagered on a contest to see who could urinate the highest on the WALL!!" "What an incredible wager!" exclaimed the priest. "What did you do?" "Well, I hit the CEILING, Father!!!"

Sister Mary burst into the office of the principal of Our Lady of Perpetual Motion School in an advanced state of agitation. "Father!" she cried, "just WAIT until you hear this!" The priest led the sister to a chair, and said, "Now just calm down and tell me what has you so excited." "Well, Father," the nun began, "I was just walking down the hall to the chapel, and I heard some of the older boys wagering money!" "A serious infraction, indeed!" said the priest. "But that's not what has me so excited, Father," replied the nun. "It was WHAT they were wagering ON! They had wagered on a contest to see who could urinate the highest on the WALL!!" "What an incredible wager!" exclaimed the priest. "What did you do?" "Well, I hit the CEILING, Father!!!"