Three football fans were driving down the road together, when they spied something laying on the side of the road. Upon investigating, they discovered a dead young woman, who was lying face up, and competely nude.

The first football fan removed his Green Bay Packers cap and placed it over her right breast. The second football fan removed his San Francisco 49er cap and placed it over her left breast. The third football fan removed his Dallas Cowboys cap and placed it over her private area. They then called the State Police, and waited for their arrival.

Upon arriving, a young State Trooper began to inspect the body. First he removed the Packers cap, looked under it and quickly replaced it. He then removed the 49ers cap and quickly replaced it too. He then removed the Cowboys cap and stared beneath it with a puzzled look. He replaced it, but soon lifted it again, looked again, and replaced it again.

By this time, the Cowboys fan was beginning to get upset with the trooper, and said… “Why do you keep looking under the Cowboys cap? Are you some kind of pervert or something?”

To which the trooper replied…”No sir, it’s just that every other time I’ve seen one of these hats there was an ASSHOLE under it.”

Q. Why do blondes wear hooped earrings?

A. To hold their ankles up during sex.

Q. What is 69 + 69?

A. Dinner for 4

Jon left for a two day business trip to Chicago. He was only a few blocks away from his house when he realized he’d left his plane ticket on top of his dresser.

He turned around and headed back to the house. He quietly entered the door and walked into the kitchen. He saw his wife washing the breakfast dishes, wearing her skimpiest negligee.

She looked so good that he tiptoed up behind her, reached around, and squeezed her left tit.

“Leave only one quart of milk,” she said. “Jon won’t be here for breakfast tomorrow.”

Responding to an ad in the paper for Bible salesmen, a man arrived for his interview. “I w-w-want to s-s-sell B-B-Bibles,” he said. His interviewer was hesitant, but because the man’s sales experience was so good, he hired him.

To everyone’s astonishment, within a few months, the fellow’s sales were the best in the company. The president called a meeting to congratulate him and to inspire the other salemen. “Son, tell us your secret for selling so many Bibles,” he said.

“I just go to the d-d-door and say, ‘W-w-would you like to b-b-buy a B-B-Bible, or should I c-c-come in and read it t-t-to you?”