Q: How do you tell the difference between a male and female chromosome?

A: Pull down their genes!!!

frans bauwer komt bij de
dokter en zegt tegen hem
ik denk dat ik aids heb
zegt de dokter : dat hoor
ik liever dan je laaste c.d.

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*** Comedy.Com’s Really Loose Translation from Dutch ***
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Frans Bauer comes to the Doctor and says to him.

Doctor, “I think I have AIDS”

The Doctor says, Well that sounds better than your
last Communicable Disease!

A young child was constantly picked on by an older one, who would make him cry. His Mother told him, “The next time he bullies you, hit him as hard as you can!” The younger boy saw the bully in the park the next day, snuck up behind him and hit him in the back of the head, super hard, knocking the bully out cold.

The little kid went home and bragged to his Mother about his success. His Mother said, “Let me see your hand.” Puzzled, the boy extended his hand toward her, for her examination.

After looking it over carefully, she said, “If you hit him as hard as you say you did, I’m surprised you didn’t break your fingers.”

The boy responded, “Heck, Mom, I’m surprised I didn’t break THE BAT!”

Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery, just for laughs. Right in the middle of the cemetery, they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.

Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

“Holy cow, Mister,” one of them said after catching his breath. “You scared us half to death! We thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?”

“Those fools!” the old man grumbled. “They misspelled my name!!!”

Q: Why do boys run faster then girls?

A: Two ball bearings and a stick shift.