Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
The teacher asked who in the class could define the word “indifferent.” Little Johnny raised his hand and said, “That’s easy, it means it feels so good.” The teacher asked how he came up with that definition, and Johnny said, “I was up in my room last night, and my sister and her boyfriend were down on the porch, and I heard her say, ‘That feels so good’ and her boyfriend said, ‘That’s cause it’s in different.’”
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I recently received an accident report from a nurse about an elderly man who had fallen from bed during the night (true account). The incident description was as follows: “Heard a noise from the side ward and on investigation found Mr.N had fallen out of bed. There were no obvious injuries and he was able to get back into bed with two nurses.”
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A man and his girlfriend are driving down the highway. The man asks “If I drive 100 mph will you take off your clothes?” and she agrees. So the man drives 100 mph and his girlfriend strips. The man is so busy looking at his girlfriend that he crashes into a tree. The car flipped over, trapping the man and all of his girlfriend’s clothes. All that is free of the car is the girlfriend and one of his shoes.…
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a.. Could you drive any better if I shoved that cell phone up your ASS? b.. If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you! c.. Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you’re an asshole d.. 100,000 sperm and YOU were the fastest? e.. Your gene pool needs a little chlorine. f.. You’re just jealous because the voices are talking to me and not you! g.. DON’T PISS ME OFF!!!!!! I’m running out of…
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Once there was this woman who was, sad to say, very flat chested. Year after year of seeing beautiful, large-breasted women walking away with handsome guys finally got the best of her. She decided that she would have large tits at any cost. At first she went to a breast treatment center and asked for larger breasts. After several weeks, despite all the injections and fillers they had given her, her breasts were no larger. She despaired. She went everywhere,…
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An American and an Englishman are sharing the same compartment on a train trip to London from Paris. During their conversation, the American criticizes the arrogance of the English people. He says to the Englishmen, “You people have such stiff upper lips that you think your people are the superior race in the world. You tend to look down on people not the same as you are. As for me, I’m proud to say that I’m a quarter Irishman, two…
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A couple was enjoying a romantic dinner, celebrating their 35th anniversary when the husband says to his wife, “Honey, it’s wonderful having been married to you for 35 years, but there is one thing I’ve often wondered and have never known for sure. Have you been true to me throughout our married years?” She suddenly gets this flushed look upon her face as responds, “Does it really matter? What really counts is that we have been happy and we’ll be…
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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman went for a round of golf and their wives went along as caddies. While walking around the course, the English man’s wife caught her foot in a rabbit hole, tripped up, and landed in a heap on the ground. Her skirt was over her head revealing that she wasn’t wearing any knickers! The Englishman stormed over and angrily demanded a reason for her state of undress. “Well darling,” she explained, “you give me so…
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Top Ten Signs Your Amish Teen is in Trouble: 10. Sometimes stays in bed til after 6 am. 9. In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women without bonnets. 8. Shows up at barn raisings in full “Kiss” makeup. 7. When you criticize him, he yells, “Thou stinketh!” 6. His name is Jebediah, but he goes by “Jeb Daddy.” 5. Defiantly says, “If I had a radio, I’d listen to rap.” 4. You come upon his secret stash of…
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Martha Stewart Holiday Calendar December 1 Blanch carcass from Thanksgiving turkey. Spray paint gold, turn upside down and use as a sleigh to hold Christmas Cards. December 2 Have Mormon Tabernacle Choir record outgoing Christmas message for answering machine. December 3 Using candlewick and handgilded miniature pine cones, fashion cat-o-nine-tails. Flog Gardener. December 4 Repaint Sistine Chapel ceiling in ecru, with mocha trim. December 5 Get new eyeglasses. Grind lenses myself. December 6 Fax family Christmas newsletter to Pulitzer committee…
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