Who s the boss Jokes - page 10

Fun at the Airport

An American businessman and his wife had just arrived in Southeast Asia and were looking for a taxi outside the air terminal when they were approached by a pimp. “Hey, Boss,” he said, “I got lots beautiful girls. You want to try my girls?” “Get away from us” said the husband “before I call the cops.” “Oh,” said the pimp, “I got lots cute boys too, Maybe you like to try my boys.” “I want the American Ambassador!” demanded the…

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In one hour…

So there was this man who was quite capable, and was looking for a job. His only problem was, …. ….well he didn’t have (ahem..) .. balls- which bothered him a lot. Finally he got a job in a Govt office. When his boss found about his handicap, he not only consoled him but told him that though the office timings are 9:30 AM to 5:30 PM, but he may come at 11:00 AM, which he accepted gladly, without bothering…

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Millenium Vocabulary

The latest terms to add to your vocabulary in the Y2K office environment: * Seagull Manager – A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps over everything and then leaves. * Salmon day – The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in the end. * Chainsaw consultant – An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee head count, leaving the brass with clean hands. * CLM – Career…

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Read JokeMillenium Vocabulary

Lenin In Poland

During the glorious days of communism, to commemorate the visit of the Soviet President Andropov to Poland, the head of the Polish Communist Party commissioned a popular Warsaw artist for an oil painting celebrating the historical visit of Lenin to Poland. The piece was to be entitled “Lenin In Poland.” Now this artist hated the Poland Communist Party and therefore also detested Lenin more so but since the pay was lucrative, he decided to accept the commission. Since there was…

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You know you work in 1990s Corporate America when….

You work 200 hours for the $100 bonus check and jubilantly say “Oh wow, thanks!” Dilbert cartoons hang outside every cube. Your boss’ favorite lines are “when you get a few minutes”, “in your spare time”, “when you’re freed up”, and “I have an opportunity for you.” Vacation is something you roll over to next year or a check you get every January. Your relatives and family describe your job as “works with computers”. Change is the norm. Nepotism is…

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Read JokeYou know you work in 1990s Corporate America when….

It’s A Bad Day When…

You receive a $300 bill from your tree surgeon and you live in an apartment. The plumber tells you it would be cheaper to install a diving board than to drain the cellar. You bear a striking resemblance to this week’s prime suspect on America’s Most Wanted. The Dialing for Dollars host quizzes you about the only John Wayne film you haven’t seen. Your heart medication has been replaced with sugar pills and a note that says “April fools!” You…

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Anything For Love

The beautiful secretary of the president of a bank goes on a sight-seeing tour with a very rich African king who was a very important client. The client out of the blue asks her to marry him. Naturally, the secretary is quite taken aback. However, she remembers what her boss told her, don’t reject the guy outright. So, she tries to think of a way to dissuade the businessman from wanting to marry her. After a few minutes, the woman…

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fact1

3 reasons why Adam and Eve were most definately black? 1.they worked in the garden 2.they stole the fruit,and 3.they lied to the Boss!

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When it rains, it pours …

A man was sitting alone at the bar looking so sad and forlorn. He had a glass of beer in front of him but he did not touch the glass for more than half an hour. Just then a burly, mean biker approached the sad man, grabbed the glass and drank all the content. As the biker wiped off the beer suds from his mouth, the man began to cry. The biker laughed and said, “Hey, man, I was just…

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Read JokeWhen it rains, it pours …