Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Coach Bobby Ross had put together the perfect Lions team. The only thing he was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges, and even the high schools, but he couldn’t find a ringer quarterback who could ensure a Super Bowl win. Then one night, while watching CNN, he saw a war-zone scene in Bosnia. In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Bosnian soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand grenade…
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Father: “When you go back to your Mom’s tonight, give her this envelope. Tell her that since you are now 18 this is the LAST check she’ll ever see from me for child support. Then, stand back and watch the expression on her face.” Daughter: “OK.” Later…. Daughter: “Mom, Dad asked me to give you this envelope. He said to tell you that since I’m now 18 this is the LAST child support payment he’ll ever have to make to…
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COLLEGE ENTRANCE EXAM FOR STUDENT ATHLETES Time Limit: 3 WEEKS 1. What language is spoken in France? 2. Give a dissertation on the ancient Babylonian Empire with particular reference to architecture, literature, law and social conditions -OR- Give the first name of Pierre Trudeau. 3. Would you ask William Shakespeare to ____ (a) build a bridge ____ (b) sail the ocean ____ (c) lead an army or ____ (d) WRITE A PLAY 4. What religion is the Pope? (check only…
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ME: My wife finally had back surgery last week…she’s been having back problems for years… YOU: Oh?…What’s been the problem? ME: She hasn’t been spending nearly enough time on it…
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When Arnold Schwartzenegger was a young boy living in Austria, he and his friends used to enjoy a game in which they pretended they were composers (being that Austria was known for having produced some great composers in its time). One day they were playing their usual game and the first boy yelled out, “I want to be Mozart!”. Immediately the second boy chimed in saying, “I want to be Chopin!”. Lastly was Arnold who was quoted as saying, “Then…
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A doe stumbled out of the woods completely disheveled and said, “That is the last time I do that again for 5 bucks!”
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A fellow was reading the paper one day lamenting the fact that his doctor has ordered him to lose 75 pounds. Next thing he sees is an advertisement for a guaranteed weight loss program. “Guaranteed like heck,” he thinks to himself, “But let’s see what they think they can do.” He calls them on the phone and subscribes to the 3 day, 10 LB weight loss program. The next day there comes a knock at his door, and when he…
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A lady lost her handbag in the bustle of Christmas shopping. It was found by an honest little boy and returned to her. Looking into her purse, she commented, “That’s funny. When I lost my bag, there was a $20 bill in it. Now there are 20 $1 bills. The boy quicky replied, “That’s right, lady. The last time I found a lady’s purse, she didn’t have any change for a reward.”
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A woman walks into a confession booth and says, “Forgive me Father for I have sined.” “Whatever troubles you child?” said the Priest. The woman answered, “Last night, my boyfriend came over and we made passionate love five times.” The Priest thought for a moment, then replied, “Go home and suck the juice from five sour lemons.” “Then will I be forgiven?” asked the women. “No,” replied the Priest, “but it will take that big smile off your face.”
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This American golf fanatic always dreamed of playing at St. Andrews, and finally got the chance. Going with his wife, they teed off andhe proceeded to play the best game of his life. After 9 holes, he was 5 strokes under par,and was on cloud nine. On the back nine, he started playing even better,even getting an Eagle on the 16th hole. He was so excited that he ended up slicing the shot on the 17th tee,and as he walked…
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