Time boy Jokes - page 6

Magic Water

One day some kids were walking down the street, and they came upon what looked like a puddle of water. They wanted to know what it was for sure, so they got a handkerchief and drug it through the water, and in front of their eyes the handkerchief disappeared. So, they did it again, and again, and everytime it disappeared. So they said we have got some magic water here. We have got to go get the priest. So, the…

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Big plane, little plane

One day a curious little boy went to his mom and said “Mommy mommy, I’ve noticed that big dogs have litlle dogs and big cats have little cats, so how come big planes don’t have little planes?” The mother looked at her boy and said, “I don’t know, ask your father.” So the boy goes and finds his dad. “Daddy, Daddy!” he yelled. “Why do big dogs have little dogs and big cats have little cats, but big planes don’t…

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Baby Names

A man and woman marry after a brief courtship and all is well for a time. Eventually they are blessed with child. The woman’s time comes, and as she is taken into the operating room, she calls the husband over. “Honey, there’s something I really have to tell you. There is as an very old tradition in our families that the oldest living male gets to name any new children born to anyone in the family. That means my brother…

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Bubba’s Babies

Bubba’s old lady had been pregnant for some time, and now the time had come. So, he brought her to the doctor, and the doctor began to deliver the baby. She had a little boy, and the doctor looked over at Bubba and said, “Hey, Bubba! You just had you a son!” Bubba got all excited, but just then the doctor spoke up and said, “Hold on, son! We ain’t finished up here yet!” The doctor then delivered a little…

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ABC’s

A boy is sitting in class one morning when his teacher says to the class, “Okay kids, I’m going to say a letter of the alphebet, and you have to tell me a word that begins with that letter.” “A” She says first, looks around at the hands and picks the boy, “Jimmy?” “Ass!” The boy shouts. “Jimmy, one more like that and I won’t pick you. Next, B” She looks around and Jimmy is the only one with his…

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So..you want to date my daughter?

Eight Rules to Follow when Dating My Daughter Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you’d better be delivering a package, because you’re sure as heck not picking anything up. Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter’s body, I will remove them. Rule…

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Mommy, Mommy! Jokes

Mommy, Mommy! What happened to all that dog food Fido wouldn’t eat? Shut up and eat your meat loaf. Mommy, Mommy! When are we going to have Aunt Edna for dinner? Shut up, we haven’t even finished your Grandmother yet. Mommy, Mommy! I hate my sisters guts. Shut up and eat what’s put in front of you. Mommy, Mommy! What’s an Oedipus complex? Shut up and kiss me! Mommy, Mommy! What’s for dinner? Shut up and get back in the…

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Fishing Between Generations

A teenage boy and his grandfather go fishing one day. While fishing, the old man starts talking about how times have changed. The young man picks up on this and starts talking about the various problems and diseases going around today. The teen says, “Grandpa, they didn’t have a whole lot of problems with all these diseases when you were young, did they?” Grandpa replies, “Nope.” His grandson says, “Well, what did you guys use for safe sex?” Grandpa replies,…

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Two More on the Way!

Already the mother of two rambunctious boys, a pregnant woman was not looking forward to having a third child to look after. Her husband, however, was thrilled when the doctor announced they were going to have twins this time. He told his wife that she should start thinking of names. “Well, let’s see,” she said. “We already have Adolph and Rudolph. How about Getoff and Stayoff?”

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Bushisms, pt 2

“I think we agree, the past is over.”?On his meeting with John McCain, Dallas Morning News, May 10, 2000 “It’s clearly a budget. It’s got a lot of numbers in it.”–Reuters, May 5, 2000 (Thanks to Allison Fansler.) GOV. BUSH: Because the picture on the newspaper. It just seems so un-American to me, the picture of the guy storming the house with a scared little boy there. I talked to my little brother, Jeb?I haven’t told this to many people.…

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