Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
This couple are just married and they go to their hotel suite. The groom is really pumped up. It’s his wedding night and he’s finally going to get some. They get to their room and he’s ready to pounce on his bride, having already stripped. She stops him and says she’s starving and would he run down to vending machine and get her a Snickers. He says, “But I’m already naked!” She says “Please I just know that I’ll be…
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A group of third, fourth and fifth graders accompanied by two female teachers went on a field trip to the local race track to learn about thoroughbred horses and the supporting industry. During the tour, some of the children needed to go to the toilet, so it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other female teacher. She was to wait outside the men’s toilet. Soon one of the boys…
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There were these three guys on a plane going from Florida to New York. The first, wearing a suit and tie, and reading the NEW YORK TIMES, commented, “Last night I made love to my wife three times. This morning she made me fresh ground coffee, brought the paper to me in bed, and she said I was the best lover in the world.” “That ain’t nothing!” said the guy reading USA TODAY, dressed in chinos and a casual shirt.…
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Ethel is a bit of a demon in her wheelchair, and loves to charge around the nursing home, taking corners on one wheel and getting up to maximum speed on the long corridors. Because the poor woman is one sandwich short of a picnic, the other residents tolerate her, and some actually join in… one day, Ethel was speeding up one corridor when a door opened and a man stepped out with his arm stretched out… “Stop!” he said in…
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After dinner and a movie, Carl drove his date to a quiet, country road and made his move. When Mary responded enthusiastically to his kissing, he tried sliding his hand up her skirt. Suddenly, she jerked away, got out of the car and stomped home. That night she wrote in her diary, “A girl’s best friends are her own two legs.” On their next date, Carl returned to the country road. As they were necking, he slid his hand up…
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To: All Employees In the past, employees have been permitted to make trips to the restroom under informal guidelines, resulting in loss of employee time and production. Effective January 5, 1986, a Restroom Trip Policy (RTP) will be established to provide a consistent and precise method of accounting for each employee’s restroom time, as well as ensuring equal time for each employee. Under this policy, a Restroom Trip Bank (RTB) will be established for each employee. The first day of…
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A man walks into a tee shirt store. There are 3 shirts on display. The first has a picture of Richard Nixon with a white mustache. Below, the picture is titled “Got Milk?” The second tee shirt has a picture of Ronald Reagan with a white mustache. It is entitled “Forgot milk”. The third tee shirt has a picture of Monica Lewinsky with a white mustache on it. It’s entitled “Not Milk”.
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A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children began discussing the dog’s duties. “They use him to keep crowds back,” said one youngster. “No,” said another. “He’s just for good luck.” A third child brought the argument to a close with this comment: “They use the dogs,” she said firmly, “to find…
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A new guy in town walks into a bar and reads a sign that hangs over the bar: FREE BEER! FREE BEER FOR THE PERSON WHO CAN PASS THE TEST! So the guy asks the bartender what the test is. Bartender: “Well, first you have to drink that whole gallon of pepper tequila, the WHOLE thing at once AND, you can’t make a face while doing it. Second, there’s a ‘gator out back with a sore tooth…you have to remove…
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Once upon a time three nuns died and went to heaven. It was very bright and beautiful. They met St. Peter at the front gate. He said, “The only way you can get into heaven is if you answer three questions. One question for each of you.” The three nuns agreed. St. Peter began to the first nun, “What was the Immaculate conception?” “Why, it’s Mary being told that Jesus was going to be born, St. Peter,” said the first…
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