Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A husband and his wife had a bitter quarrel on their anniversary day. The husband gave his wife a gift, a tombstone, with the inscription: HERE LIES MY WIFE…. COLD AS EVER Later the furious wife bought a return present, also a tombstone, on which the inscription read: HERE LIES MY HUSBAND… STIFF AT LAST
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Day 1. Just celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary with not much to celebrate. When it came time to reenact our wedding night, he locked himself in the bathroom and cried. Wussy. Day 2. Today, he says he has a big secret to tell me. He’s impotent, he says, and he wants me to be the first to know. Why doesn’t he tell me something I don’t know! I mean, gimme a break. He’s been dysfunctional for so long that he…
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The smallest cemetery in the world? A pussy. It only takes one stiff at a time.
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Top Ten Things That Sound Dirty At The Office But Aren’t: 10. I need to whip it out by 5. 9. Mind if I use your laptop? 8. Just stick it in my box. 7. If I have to lick one more, I’ll gag! 6. I want it on my desk, NOW!!! 5. HMMMMMMMM….I think it’s out of fluid! 4. My equipment is so old, it takes forever to finish. 3. It’s an entry-level position. 2. When do you think…
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One day, this lady decided to breed chickens. She found out, though, that she was unlucky in this hobby. Finally, she wrote to the Department of agriculture, hoping to get some helpful advice. Her letter read, “Dear Sir or Madam, every morning when I go to check on my prize chickens, I always find one or two of them lying all stiff and cold on the ground with their legs in the air. Would you please be kind enough to…
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Q: Why must you take a lot of water with Viagra? A: If it should get stuck in your throat you would get a stiff neck.
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The tensions of life were threatening to get a strangle hold on Bill, and after he’d finished a good dinner, he relaxed mindlessly in a soft chair next to the stereo, with a stiff drink in his hand. His wife knew nothing of his nervous state, and she climbed onto his lap with the thought of trying to wheedle a fur coat out of him, and snuggled and murmured and fondled. “Good Heavens, Hillary,” he exploded, “Get off! I get…
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(to the tune of car innuendo guy) Oh, baby baby baby I wanna check your emissions, Buh buh baby baby baby I wanna grind your transmission. Buh buh baby baby baby, my fuzzy dice are feeling ripe ‘Cause I wanna shove my manly crankshaft up your rusty tailpipe I’m your car innuendo guy, your car innuendo guy Oh, baby baby baby Pump my piston ’til it’s sore Buh buh baby baby baby I wanna slam your back door Buh buh…
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There were two men who had gone to the same college and had become great friends. During college, they had a great time together. They were always right in the middle of anything happening. When they graduated, however, they each went their own separate ways. Two or three years later, they ran into one another on the street. They were very happy to see each other. During the conversation, one of them asked the other what he was doing for…
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Miss Thelma McDonald, a sweet little old lady, got a great deal of pleasure out of feeding the squirrels in her back yard. There seemed to be a female and a male, whom she named Bonnie and Clyde, and several smaller squirrels whom she assumed were their children. Every morning she would leave mixed nuts under her beautiful sycamore and watch her furry little friends come for breakfast. Her next door neighbor, old Mr. Curdy, did not enjoy the squirrels.…
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