Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
102 REASONS IT’S GREAT TO BE A GUY. 1. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. 2. Movie nudity is virtually always female. 3. You know stuff about tanks. 4. A five day vacation requires only one suitcase. 5. Monday Nite Football. 6. You don’t have to monitor your friends sex lives. 7. Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter. 8. You can open all your own jars. 9. Old friends don’t give you crap if you’ve lost or gained…
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THE PERFECT DAY – FOR HER -8.15 Wake up to hugs and kisses -8.30 Weigh in 2Kg lighter than yesterday -8.45 Breakfast in bed, freshly squeezed orange juice and croissants; open presents – expensive jewelery chosen by thoughtful partner -9.15 Soothing hot bath with frangipani bath oil -10.00 Light work out at club with handsome funny personal trainer -10.30 Facial, manicure, shampoo, condition, blow dry -12.00 Lunch with best friend at fashionable outdoor cafe -12.45 Catch sight of husband/ boyfriend’s…
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Here’s one for the women: ADD a bed SUBTRACT your clothes DIVIDE your legs so we can MULTIPLY. Yo mama got more extensions than AT&T. Yo mama so fat her blood type is rocky road. Yo mama so old when Moses parted the Red Sea she was taking a swim. Yo family so black if they hold hands they look like a stretch limo. Yo mama so stupid she thought Taco Bell was a phone company. Yo mama so fat…
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A man is out drinking with his buddies one night and suddenly realizes he has stayed too late and is in for trouble when he gets home. “No problem,” says his friend, “Do what I do to my wife. Sneak into the bedroom, crawl up under the blanket between her legs and do a little oral sex! She’ll forget all about being mad and fall right asleep.” So the guy gets home to a dark, quiet house. He creeps in…
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01. Well, this day was a total waste of makeup. 02. Make yourself at home! Clean my kitchen. 03. Who are these kids and why are they calling me Mom? 04. A hard-on doesn’t count as personal growth. 05. Don’t bother me. I’m living happily ever after. 06. Do I look like a fricking people person? 07. This isn’t an office. It’s Hell with fluorescent lighting. 08. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left. 09.…
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THE PERFECT WOMAN 1. I wanna swallow it all…I love the taste. 2. Are you sure you’ve had enough to drink? 3. I’m bored. Wanna shave my pussy? 4. Shouldn’t you be down at the bar with your buddies? 5. That was a great fart. Do another. 6. I’ve decided to stop wearing clothes around the house. 7. You’re soooo sexy when you’re hungover. 8. I’d rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping. 9. Let’s subscribe…
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1: What do you call a blonde between two brunettes? A mental block! 2: What do you say to a blonde that won’t give in? “Have another beer.” 3: What’s a blonde’s favorite wine? “Daddy! I want to go to Miami 4: Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, a smart blonde, and a dumb blonde are walking down the street. They spot a $100 on the ground. Who gets it? Nobody. The first four don’t exist and the…
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YO MAMMA IS SO FAT ?Yo momma so fat her nickname is “DAMN!” ?Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. ?Yo momma so fat we’re in her right now ?Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise ?Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone ?Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors ?Yo mamma so fat you have to roll over twice to get off…
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This is an excerpt from a Mulls & Boot story, set in the South Island of New Zealand. WARNING, this is steamy stuff. You either need to read this curled-up on a sofa with an exotic drink or with a cold shower close-by………. We met in a secluded field, the sun nearly kissing the evening horizon.The warm breeze was full of that earthy musky scent that only those fortunate enough to live outside the urban rat race know, and quiet…
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SO BIG Yo mama’s so big, that she climbed Mt. Fuji with one step. Yo mama’s so big, her belly button’s got an echo. Yo mama’s so big, she can’t wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing on her back. Yo mama’s so big, she rollerskates on busses. Yo mama’s so big, she thought Barnum & Bailey were clothing designers. Yo mama’s so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker. Yo mama’s so big, she uses bowling…
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