Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A husband and wife go visit a marriage counselor. First, the wife speaks to the counselor alone. The counselor asks, “You say you’ve been married 20 years, so what seems to be the problem?” The wife replies, “It’s my husband — he’s driving me crazy! I’m going to leave him if he continues!” “How does he drive you crazy?” “For 20 years,” she says, “he’s been doing these stupid things. First, whenever we go out, he’s always looking at the…
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Little Johnny asked his mother, “mam, is our new au pair girl a mechanical woman, you know, a robot?” “Of course not, Johnny, why do you ask?” “Well, I just heard Daddy telling the man next door that he’d like to screw her ass off.”
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Hearts and roses and kisses galore, What the hell is all that shit for? People get mushy and start acting queer, It is definitely the most annoying day of the year, This day needs to get the hell over with and pass, Before I shove a dozen roses up Cupid’s ass, I’ll spend the day so drunk I can’t speak, And wear all black for the rest of the week, Guys act all sweet, but it soon will fade, For…
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1. I think Barry Manilow is one cool motherfucker. 2. No I don’t want another beer. I have to work tomorrow. 3. Her tits are just too big. 4. Sometimes I just want to be held. 5. That chick on “20/20” gives me a woody. 6. Sure! I’d LOVE to wear a condom. 7. We haven’t been to the mall for ages, let’s go shopping and I can hold your purse. 8. Screw Monday Night Football; let’s watch “Ally McBeal”.…
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Sing the song below to the tune of “Summer Lovin’” from the musical “Grease.” Bill: “Summer intern, had me a blast” Monica: “White house intern, happened so fast” Bill: “Met a girl, crazy for me” Monica: “Met the prez, down on my knees” Bill: “Summer days sucking away but, oh oh, those summer nights” Investigation Committee: “Well, ah.. well, ah….well, ah UH! Tell us more, tell us more” Linda Tripp: “Try to remember your best” Investigation Committee: “Tell us more,…
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A young woman was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. She went down to the docks and was about to leap into the frigid water when a handsome young sailor saw her tottering on the edge of the pier crying. He took pity on her and said, “Look, you’ve got a lot to live for. I’m off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away…
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Q.) How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? A.) None, they all just sit in the dark and bitch.
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Each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts together a list to try to give the faculty a sense of the mindset of that year’s incoming freshmen. Here’s this year’s list: **************************************** 1. The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 1980. 2. They have no meaningful recollection of the Reagan Era and did not know he had ever been shot. 3. They were prepubescent when the Persian Gulf War was waged.…
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Men are a misunderstood lot, which all in all is probably for the best. Women are better off not knowing that we eat with our hands the minute they leave the room or that we use their nail clippers to trim our nose hair. Better for them, better for us. Still, it’s annoying that women spend more time and money trying to understand the minds of cats than they do, wondering about what makes men tick. Which is why they’ll…
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Yo Mama’s like a hardware store. Five cents for a screw!
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