Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Grandma walks into the laundry where she sees gramps with one hand pulling “Mr.Johnson” right out straight on the ironing board. In his other hand he has a can and is spraying that “one eyed wonder worm” for all it is worth. Grandma screams, “Just what the hell do you think you are doing with my starch?” “It’s ok, hon,” says gramps, “I heard on TV to keep it hard I should use Niagara.” Granny just sighed and shook her…
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Parents are embarrassing, Take my dad. Every time a friend comes to stay the night, he does something that makes my face go red. Now don’t get me wrong. He is a terrific dad. I love him but sometimes I think he will never grow up. He loves playing practical jokes. This behavior first started one night when Anna came to sleep over. Unknown to me, dad sneaks into my room and puts Doona, our cat, on the spare bed.…
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A lawyer is walking down the street, and he accidentally steps in a pile of dog mess. A few seconds later, he happens to be looking down at his fee, and he notices is dripping from his shoes. He screams, “AAAHHHH! I’M MELTING!”
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A man and his wife are out playing golf. They tee off and his drive goes to the right while her drive goes to the left. The wife finds her ball in a patch of buttercups. She grabs a club and takes a mighty swing at the ball. She hits a beautiful second shot, but in the process she hacks the hell out of the buttercups. Suddenly a woman appears out of nowhere. The mystery woman looks at the wife…
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The following are two of the top three winners of a Most Embarrassing Moments Contest: “While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving *right now*, she would be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said…
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A recent Scottish immigrant attends his first baseball game in his new country and after a base hit he hears the fans yelling ?run… run!? The next batter connects heavily with the ball. The Scotsman stands up and roars with the crowd in his thick accent, ?R-r-run ya bahstard, r-run will ya!? A third batter slams a hit and again the Scotsman, obviously pleased with his knowledge of the game, screams ?R-r-run ya bahstard, r-r-run will ya!? The next batter…
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There was this party in the woods and, all of a sudden there was a downpour of rain and thunder. These two young men ran for about 10 minutes in the pouring rain, and finally reached their car just as the rain let up. They jumped in the car, started it up and headed down the road, laughing and, of course, still drinking one beer after the other. All of a sudden an old man’s face appeared outside the passenger…
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A man’s wife asks him to go to the store to buy some cigarettes. He walks down to the store only to find it closed, so he goes into a nearby bar to use the vending machine. At the bar he sees a beautiful woman and starts talking to her. They have a couple of beers and one thing leads to another and they end up in her apartment. After they’ve had their fun, he realizes its 3AM and says,…
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A blonde is on her way to the mall. As she drives past a field of potatoes, she sees a blonde in a boat rowing in the field. Seeing this, she stops suddenly, jumps out of her car and screams to the blonde in the field, “You know it’s blondes like you that give us a bad name! If I could swim I’d come over and throttle you!”
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One sunny summer day four rabbis are having a discussion on some part of the Torrah. Three agree on one explanation but the fourth one stands on the other. Being tired of this conversation he raises his arms and says, “God, give me a sign to prove that I’m right!” Suddenly, thunder clouds appear out of nowhere and cover the sky. The three other rabbis think for a while and say, “Nah, that’s just a coincidence” So, the rabbi raises…
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