Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Gals, when someone asks, “Why aren’t you married?” Here are some suggested retorts: “You haven’t asked yet.” “I was hoping to do something meaningful with my life.” “What? And spoil my great life?” “Nobody would believe me in white.” “Because I just love hearing this question.” “Just lucky, I guess.” “It gives my mother something to live for.” “My fiance is awaiting parole.” “I’m still hoping for a shot at Miss America.” “Do you know how hard it is to…
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In a checkout line the other day, this couple was arguing about whose turn it was to pay. The clerk was kind of half listening until she heard the lady say to the guy, “Stop being a scrote.” With a furrowed brow, the clerk asked, “What is a scrote?” Without missing a beat, the lady responded, “Short for scrotum. He is somewhere between a prick and an asshole.”
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A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. It fit under his shirt and was not noticeable at all. On the first day of the term, still with the cast under his shirt, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in school. Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, he opened the window as wide as possible and then busied himself with desk work. When a strong breeze…
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I was reading in the paper today and I guess about a week ago this guy was trying to hire somebody to kill his wife. So he called up this Mafia guy named Arty. He asked Arty, “How much it would cost to kill my wife?” “A dollar,” Arty replied. So the guy said, “Every Tuesday my wife goes to Consumers at 6:00 and you can?t miss her cause she?s blonde and she drives a red sports car.” So the…
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With Viagra such a hit, Pfizer is bringing forth a whole line of drugs oriented towards improving the performance of men in today’s society….. DIRECTRA: a dose of this drug given to men before leaving on car trips caused 72 percent of them to stop and ask directions when they got lost, compared to a control group of 0.2 percent. PROJECTRA: men given this experimental new drug were far more likely to actually finish a household repair project before starting…
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DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE PSYCHIC MIDGET WHO ESCAPED FROM JAIL? THE HEADLINE READ: “SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!”
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Two bishops were discussing the decline of morals in the modern world. “I didn’t sleep with my wife before I was married,” said one clergy-man, self-righteously. “Did you?” “I don’t know,” said the other. “What was her maiden name?”
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Why did the blonde snort Nutra-Sweet? She thought it was diet coke!!!
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1) If you and I were squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole? 2) I’d like to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like a feed bag. 3) If it’s true that we are what we eat, I could be YOU by morning! 4) How do you like your eggs: poached, scrambled, or “fertilized”? 5) I was about to go masturbate and I needed a name to go with your face. 6) My love for…
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Q. What should you do if you girlfriend starts smoking? A. Slow down and use a lubricant. Q. What’s six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? A. Money Q. How can you spot the blind guy at the nudist colony? A. It’s not hard. Q. Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony? A. The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts. Q: Who is the most…
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